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My mom died a while back and probate has been prolonged. My sister is the executor because I live abroad. My sister has continued to use Mom’s checking and savings accounts and her credit card for anything to do with looking after the estate as it was our understanding that the executor could do this. She was already doing this as Mom's POA anyway because Mom had some dementia and had lost some of her executive functions. And my sister’s name is on the checking and savings account anyway.


Now we have hit a problem with a dispute for a credit card payment and realised only Mom’s name is on that account. The bank obviously doesn’t want to do anything without speaking to Mom. We’ve realised that my sister had not informed them that Mom had died because she was worried that they would freeze the accounts even with her name on them. Our probate lawyer had agreed with this. Now we are not sure if we have done all this correctly.


We can’t ask the probate lawyer because he seems to have dropped out of the picture and isn’t responding to messages. We aren’t sure what happened but he hasn’t followed through with helping us through probate and still hasn’t even charged for what he has done already. We are looking for another probate lawyer but it takes time.


So in the meantime I’m asking all you wise people who’ve been through dealing with the after effects of someone dying. What do you think? Is my sister allowed to continue using Mom’s card for dealing with her estate? And does she need to inform the bank that Mom has died? And is the bank allowed to freeze the accounts?

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Thank you everyone for your input. Firstly I do not have any concerns whatsoever about my sister being up front and honest. Second, my sisters name is on both the savings and checking accounts already, I think done when she became POA. We thought it was on the credit card as well until now. All with the same bank. We discussed with the lawyer at the time of filing for probate about informing the bank and our concerns with the account being frozen. He said we were ok to do what we did as she has been signing her name as executor. We were concerned the account would be frozen despite her name being on it as we know of several people this happened to. It shouldn’t have been done but it was. If that had been the case we would not have been able to pay the bills.

All her SS, retirement etc all were stopped and any overpayments have been paid back. Using these accounts has been specifically for maintenance of Moms properties and assets until everything could be finalised. And using the credit card is like GardenArtist says, it keep everything accountable. Everything has been slowed down by the lawyer being slow, my sister living out of town and having such a demanding job and me living out of the country.

Again I do NOT have ANY concerns about my sister taking advantage of her position. She is my twin and I trust her completely. Both of us thought her name was on the credit card as well.
But we have had some advice now and it looks like we are nearing the end of the situation anyway. We’ve decided to just pay the business we are having a dispute with, leave them with honest reviews online and move on. Just don’t have the time to fight it. Then we can deal with the credit card company separately and get everything sorted out. Finally.
Thank you all for your help and support.
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AlvaDeer Mar 2021
Thanks so much for the update. Sure wish you luck. thanks for responding; so few people do that, and it is much appreciated.
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I've used a credit card, checking and savings accounts initially held jointly with my father to pay post-death trust expenses, with absolutely no problems.   But since we held the account jointly, it's a different situation than you face.

I have some concerns about using a card for someone who's died w/o informing the credit card holder.   Your sister should contact the card holder and ask specifically how to insure that she can continue to use it.  Don't ask "if", but rather "how".

There may be some issues with adding the Executrix a/k/a Personal Representative designation to a card.   Banks may not issue to an entity, but will issue to a person.  I ran into that when I tried to retitle my sister's vehicle; the MI Secretary of State refused to retitle to an entity as opposed to a person, so I had to retitle the vehicle in my name.  

A similar issue arose with  insurance policies; I had to retitle in the name of the Trustees, as agents said an insurance company won't insure an "entity".  

If your sister held bank accounts jointly, w/ survivorship rights, with your mother, she should be able to continue using them, but she definitely should have informed the bank so they're aware of the situation.

I would spend some quiet time assembling all the facts, death certs, etc., then create questions to ask both the card holder and the bank, phrased in the sense of (a) what, if anything, is required to ensure that your sister can still use the accounts, and (b) HOW to ensure that those accounts remain available to your sister during any transition of ownership and titling.    If you have a bank with knowledgable staff, they should be able to help.


As to the dispute, I would approach the holder again as "HOW" do we correct the situation so that the card can be used, or should a new card be issued?   If you continue to phrase the issues as "how to correct/change", you or your sister are establishing a position of wanting to correct the issues, and advising the card holder that's your intent.   

If the card holder refuses to consider the charges viable b/c the card was issued in your mother's name only, then I would not let them off the hook, but rather ask again "HOW" the situation can be changed (so that you don't have to turn to a different card holder  (hint, hint...find a solution or we'll have to take our business elsewhere).

When I ran into problems of a business not wanting to do something, I found that approaching it as I've described above (the "how" method) worked much better, as it established a cooperative approach on our side, and seemed to let them know I wasn't there to battle with them (even if privately I might have considered it.)
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No your sister should not be using the credit, checking or savings account. The bank should have been notified of your mother’s death.
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I'm not an American but I'll tell you what I know - She was supposed to inform the CC company, bank and every other interested party that your mother is deceased and that would have frozen the accounts, so what she has been doing is not legal and could even be construed as fraudulent.
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After FIL died, DH got 10 notarized copies of the death certificate. He had them on hand for whenever he had to visit a bank, credit union, cc company...even the Drs offices. He didn't want to have ANY issues with how he was distributing funds. Every check was signed by him as "executor for and behalf of Mr. E, who is deceased."

CC's were shut down immediately. Banking continued but ONLY the executor could spend any money from dad's accounts.

Even though FIL'S estate was relatively small (under $900,000) DH was still completely transparent in his dealings.

We had zero financial issues. FIL's atty gave DH a 1/2 hr 'tutorial' so he'd know what to do.

You can straighten this out--and remember this as a cautionary tale.

Good Luck unsnarling this.
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well my moms discover card is still active ( she passed 1/8) because I did not close it in case any other bills came through from her medical bills. None in the last 2 months so I plan to close it this month. it is direct pay, and I have left her account ( with my name on it) open in case any came through, so they would get paid. No one has closed it here in Maryland.., I think I have to? And all her banks know she has passed.
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MJ1929 Mar 2021
Credit card companies aren't the banks. You need to cancel the card.
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I don't understand why Sister is using a Credit Card at all. It just needs to be paid by the estate anyway. If it were me, I would only be using the checking account and savings to pay bills of the estate. When the money is gone, its gone. Sister can get Probate going. She should have a short certificate to handle the estate. An estate account needs to be set up where all the transactions are done. There will be an accounting of monies spent for the beneficiaries. I did all applications. Got a lawyer involved in the sale of Moms house, he finished the Probate.
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GardenArtist Mar 2021
JoAnn, I used a credit card for all charges to my sister's and now my father's Trust activities (a) b/c I get points that reduce the charged amounts, and (b) it's a good method of documenting the charges, w/o having to produce checking statements.  

This is not only for my benefit, but for the benefit of the other heir, even though I keep spreadsheets of the charges (which could be challenged by a contentious, suspicious heir.)
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If your sister isn't on the account for the credit card, no,she cannot use it. That's credit card fraud. All banking related to your mother would be "To the Estate of (Mom)," not merely "Mom," because "Mom" is deceased.

If your sister is on an account, that's different. The account can remain open, but she can't sign Mom's name or anything like that because your sister is the sole owner of the account now.
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I’m going through probate for my dads estate right now in Michigan. Before I could use any funds from his estate I had to file with probate court, get the process started and approved and get “Letter of Authority “ from the probate judge. It all took several weeks. Once approved I opened an estate account which I have now used to pay some expenses.

You Sis sounds hinky to me. Find out if she has court authority to use these funds.
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I can't see any CC company allowing an estate to use credit as a means of payment, they have no way to guarantee that there are sufficient funds held by the estate to get their money back (unless of course the executor accepts personal responsibility, and I sure as heck wouldn't ever recommend that!).
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GardenArtist Mar 2021
CWillie, I think the reason why the bank through which out credit cards were issued also maintained our checking and savings accounts, still does,  and can be assured from the balances that the funds are adequate to pay for the credit charges.

But I can see that if the accounts weren't all held with the same bank, there definitely would be concern until some assurance were provided.
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