Follow
Share

I loved my father so much. I want to tell him how sorry I am for all the pain I caused. I am looking forward to death just to see him again. Please don't think I'm such a bit case. I'm just a daughter who lives and missed her father who passed in 1984.

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Find Care & Housing
Yes friend, there is an afterlife for everyone, & our destination is up to us. God left clear directions to heaven in the Bible, which is: Jesus' Cross. We can't ever make it on our own merits... So God provided a Savior for us to embrace or not. 1Cor15)"Brethren, I declare unto you the Gospel which I preached unto you, & wherein ye stand;
2) By which also ye are saved...
3) ...how that Christ died for our sins according to the scriptures; &
4) that he was buried, & He rose again the third day." (God raised Christ to show us that death isn't the end, & show that Christ's cross was acceptable payment for the sins of the world.)
Helpful Answer (7)
Report

This is a question in which you will get many answers. Some don't believe in an after life, some do. It is my conviction that the Bible is a true account of history and also tells us the future. The Bible has over 300 prophecies that have come true. Most of those regarding Jesus and his death and Resurrection. Jesus said "I am the way, the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except by me." John 14:6 Faith in Jesus Christ (of the bible, as there are many false jesus' out there) as your savior, repenting of your sins and submission to his word is the way to salvation. It takes an open heart, and study to find the truth but if you have that then I believe God will give you the truth you need to make the correct decision. As for our loved ones who have died and the guilt we have for words unspoken. We all have that. Things we said we wish we hadn't; things we wish we had. We are imperfect people. I'm sure your dad knew you loved him. I'm sure that hurtful words spoken were known to be said in anger. As a child, parent and wife I have said things I didn't mean; my children have said things they didn't mean and I know that. It's a part of life. My whole family is gone with dad as the exception and he has almost forgotten me. There are many things I wish I had done differently in my relationships with my family. Will we see our loved ones? I believe yes, if we and they are "born again" believers in Jesus Christ. Our relationship with God is a personal one. He is our creator and his son, Jesus, died to pay the penalty for our sins. Every human who has been born has had to make a decision about Jesus. My own father ridicules my faith. I pray for him but should he not become a believer then it was his decision to reject the God who loved him so much he had his own Son die for his sins (John 3:16). Let the past be past and look for your own relationship with God. Lots of people have heard the Serenity Prayer but not the whole version. Here it is, may if comfort you. Serenity Prayer - Long version
God grant me the Serenity
To accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can,
And the Wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time,
Enjoying one moment at a time.
Accepting hardship as a pathway to peace,
Taking, as he did, this sinful world as it is,
Not as I would like it.
Trusting that he will make all things right,
If I surrender to his will.
That I may be reasonably happy in this world
And supremely happy in the next.
Reinhold Niebuhr, Noted German Theologian
Helpful Answer (6)
Report
rovana Jun 2019
Beautiful!  Thank you.
(1)
Report
See 3 more replies
You couldn't have been too old in 84. Kids do things when they are young and I think our parents forgive us. I know I have forgiven my daughter.

None of us really know what happens after death. Some have found salvation and feel they will go to heaven and see those we have loved. My Mom had faith and knew where she was going. I know she is now pain free and whole again.
Helpful Answer (4)
Report

I personally am an atheist and just don't seem to have a gene for belief. I never did and am 76 so unlikely at this point to change as I have been in many foxholes without belief hitting. However, nothing will surprise me if I am wrong, as I sure have been wrong before. That said, you seem to believe. Whatever you do believe I would imagine you do believe that your father has passed out of our confusing realm into one that has more understanding. I have heard many people who have had near death experiences and the thing they have expressed most often to me (I was a nurse) is that they felt a profound peace, love and understanding. So if this is the case your father, wherever he is, already understands. And what would he want, given that understanding? I would say, as a Mom myself, that he would want YOU to forgive YOURSELF now. Go on and pay it all forward. Work to make others happier. Compliment a stranger. And talk to your Dad. If you are right he may be somewhere listening. Don't spend lots of time, but once a day talk to him, or write him a note. This is what I did today, Dad." " I wonder what you would say to guide me in this decision, Dad." While you are living, I believe your Dad lives. In latin america some believe that we die three deaths: 1) our death 2) the service after the death, or the time of mourning and gathering 3) when the last person who remembers us dies. I wish you so much luck. I cannot imagine mourning this long. I do feel the presence of my parents, who died many years ago, and my bro and I speak of them, remember them, laugh about them, and the lessons we are just now getting that they long ago taught us. If you are mourning this many years I would suggest a few sessions with a good psychologist who specializes in mourning to give you some insight to help you through. Choose love. Choose life. Choose joy. I believe that your Dad, any dad at all would want that for his child. It would make him very happy.
Helpful Answer (4)
Report
TheBlackDogMina Jun 2019
Best response! And well-stated. As someone born into and raised in the Roman Catholic Church, I can tell you vividly the day I rejected that "faith" at 8YO. I saw that Monsignor coming down the aisle in his flapping black robes, looking like nothing but a big crow.....and the adults I was supposed to emulate, in deference to him....why?.....for a bunch of platitudes.
My Mom rejected it at 80+YO due to the child abuse horrors and coverups. Brave woman. Lost many so-called friends. I have a visceral disgust w/much of "organized religion" now. Although, I also have great friends who are very religious: we accept each other and don't judge. It works for us.

But I share your agnostic view for many reasons, not the least due to my experience in the desert of Afghanistan when I suddenly, unexpectantly, lost my lovely, vibrant, 25 YO husband. No, not in the War. Many years before....We were scientists on academic assignment.
He was granted a formal Hindu cremation. It was the most beautiful and memorable experience of my life. I won't share details but one of the most beautiful things I saw that day, following D's cremation service, was the wedding party, bride and groom in lovely, local finery, on a donkey cart, making their way to the same lovely little stonewalled courtyard for their nuptials.
LIFE is indeed a CIRCLE.
AND.....that is all I know for sure.
And all I need for living a good and giving life NOW.
(3)
Report
I believe it is safer to believe God exists and through faith in Jesus the fear of death is conquered which also means there is life after death because Jesus raised from the dead and find out you were right. I believe that is safer than not believing and finding out that you were wrong.

If Jesus' resurrection were not true, then why would so many willingly loose their life in the days of the early church and today over in Africa and China?

As the hymn says, "Because he lives
I can face tomorrow
Because he lives
All fear is gone
Because I know
He holds the future
And life is worth the living
Just because he lives."

Also, as the Apostle Paul wrote in I Corinthians 15 and I summarize, 'if Jesus is not risen, then our faith is in vain, we of all people should be pitied for that would mean that our sins are not forgiven'
Helpful Answer (4)
Report
Sendhelp Jun 2019
Yes!
(0)
Report
See 1 more reply
Sego, guilt is because you did something wrong, not because someone was upset by what you did.

You and your sister did nothing wrong protecting your mom from these unscrupulous scumbags. She may have been mad, but that doesn't make it wrong.

Let go of the guilt.
Helpful Answer (4)
Report

I am agnostic. Raised in Methodist church. Many relatives also Roman Catholic.
My mother passed away last week. My cousin, came in from North Carolina over memorial day holiday. Many relatives as well to bid goodbye..

My cousin saw my dad who died some 45 years ago carrying a baby. My parents lost an infant son. I firmly think my mom had an escort, a guide. To where, I don't know. This has been reported too,many times to be an anomaly.

How does that answer your question? I don't know. But I would imagine your father had one or more guides too.

I miss my dad too, who died 10 years before yours. But by my cousin seeing what she did, I am convinced of end of life guides. I hope this is a comfort to you.

Eta. This was same cousin who ran into my dad in Westminster Abbey years ago. London. What are the odds of that in actual life?
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

Isthisrealyreal summed it up,

"We know because we believe what the bible says. It is truly simple." 

Your Dad probably forgave you long ago, forgive yourself.

Holding regrets and guilt is a stronghold of the devil.
Don't let him defeat you.
Praying you will find comfort in Jesus.
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

Janet - you are not crazy for wanting your dad back. I'm relieved that you're not planning to end you life. Phew!!!

I hope you can find some peace because that's what your dad would want for you. .
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

"But I don't want to believe in reincarnation. How will I meet up with my dad if he is reincarnated?.......Why doesn't he come to me like that knowing how much I want to see him? I grew up with no mother. He was mother and father to me. He was such a good person. ......He had such hopes for me. I was a disappointment."

Janet, I can hear the hurt, the sadness and the pain in your words, and how much you want to see your dad again. I am so sorry.

Spiritual growth is a very personal journey. For me, it doesn't work when someone tells me to attend this, or join that, etc. It is something I have to discover for myself when I am ready. So, I am not telling you to believe anything or read anything you don't want to.

The same goes for personal development, people grow and mature when they are ready. You said you were a disappointment. PAST TENSE. You were, but you are not anymore. You dad would be very touched to read the words you wrote here. If you want to make it up to him, live your life in a way that would make him proud.
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

See All Answers
This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter