Hubby is a sweet and gentle soul. And, as we all know, repeats questions almost with the same breath over and over again. I've been using your suggestions of "using the same answer words", "keep it simple", "remember it's the disease", "change the subject" (which sometimes doesn't work by the way). But, sometimes I am at the short end of MY stick. This has happened twice to me now in the last month as far as my lashing out in frustration and anger. He doesn't deserve it. He's done nothing wrong. Do I walk out of the room telling him I need some time to think? Like in AlAnon? Or any other suggestions?
You're right that trying to change the subject doesn't always work until something major changes the course of his thinking. My Dad was in the hospital this weekend and he kept saying it's time for him to change clothes and head to the dining room [at his IL/AL complex]... no matter how many times I told him he was in the hospital, again he would say the same thing. It wasn't under the meal tray was delivered by the hospital that Dad was finally distracted. Whew.
I think walking out of the room is the best bet if he doesn't need to be watched continually..... unless he following you around the house. Sometimes I can re-direct Dad by turning on the Weather Channel as he is fascinated with the weather in different areas.
Babalou, Hubby is on meds already for the dementia. I do have a caregiver come in two mornings a week which suits me ok. He doesn't go to Daycare although we have discussed it. The caregiver gives him the outside attention he'd get there. And Hubby does get out during the week with other family members.
He's such a dear.
Thank you again.
Does your husband understand that he has dementia? How him that you are on his side!
It is difficult and stressful to have things repeated over and over. I just tried to keep calm and tolerate it. I don't think I could deal with it 24/7.
My loved one is in Memory Care and I'm glad that she has care there. I will offer that the repeating was something that she did much earlier in her progression. After about a year she stopped repeating as much. Only rarely will she repeat anymore. She was in the hospital ER recently due to a fall and she kept telling me that she loved me, (this was said about ever 30 seconds for hours) but that's the only time I have heard her repeat in a long time.
So, there is a chance that the repeating will reduce as he progresses.
Yes, how true you are. He and I are a blended family. I'd bounce off my problems to him; and he'd give thoughts. Now ----- well, not very much any more because he doesn't remember families too much any more. And your right, sometimes, he can't figure out how to even put on a shirt. Hugs to you.
If he was in the Navy, segue into conversations about boot camp, deployment, missions, etc.
Military guys love to talk about their live in the service.
A really challenging method though would switch your frustration from creative thinking. How can you answer the same question differently each time? That would show real creativity on your part and hopefully would be inspirational rather than frustrating.
I get him to read out loud to me. Seems to keep him occupied while I'm working on the computer since we're in the same room. I just keep "umhumming" and "is that so" every so often. Works