I have heard that if a care recipient is basically non-responsive, that the right decision is sometimes to withhold food and fluids, if death is imminent and no hope for recovery. I have heard from a couple of people that withholding fluids is painful to patient, even if they are non-responsive.
I am trying to educate myself before we get to that point, so am not in a position to discuss with her Doctor yet. Her patient advocate paperwork is clear about food, but doesn't mentions fluids.
Thanks for your input. This forum has been a great educational and supportive resource.
The concern is choking more than anything, so you can get many products over the counter to help fight dry mouth if your loved one isn't taking in any fluids.
My dad had cancer, and he couldn't get anything "past" his mouth after a while, almost as though something was preventing him from swallowing. He didn't have choking issues; he just couldn't seem to arrange whatever was in his mouth to swallow it. His biggest complaint, though, wasn't hunger or thirst, but the dry mouth drove him nuts. We got the mouthwash and the gel that comes in a tube and found the gel to be the most effective and longer-lasting.
Please look into hospice care, though, and don't wait too long. Their nurses are the best thing to have in your corner at that time.
The dying are NOT hungry. They are NOT thirsty. They are spoon fed ice chips for as long as they are able to swallow.
When they cannot swallow any longer, a swap is placed in their mouth to moisten it.
No one is being starved. No one has anxiety or pain if receiving care from hospice because the program is all about dying with dignity and free from anxiety and pain.
Mom was given Ativan and morphine every two hours towards the end. She died peacefully.
Wishing you peace as you navigate your way through your caregiving challenges. Continue to reach out with any concerns. We care. I will certainly keep you in my thoughts and prayers.