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my mom is 91 yrs. old and has dementia and depression. she is so afraid of dyeing and she is upset and crying all the time. I need some help as how to take care of her. are there any books out there that I could read that would help me to know what I am supposed to do?

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Bring her to see her Dr. And let him know her symptoms. It sounds like she may need some anxiety medication. Good luck I know everyday is a challenge being a care giver.
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my mother went from the depression cycles to constant hallucinations. it finally took monthly haldol injections to keep her feet on the ground. it turned into phsycosis is what im sayin. the last 3 months of her life there were no crying jags. its all interwoven. i just read an article in a brit newspaper that links people with a history of bipolar and depression to eventual dementia. i can believe that. my mother has been hospitalized 4-5 times in her life with depressive or manic episodes. a less than healthy brain is succeptable to dementia? not hard to phathom.
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Why is she afraid of dying? Are you sure that's what she's afraid of? What does she say about it? Is she religious? Would she feel good about seeing Jesus or her parents and siblings in heaven?

Can you assure her that you will take care of her and keep her safe? I think she may be afraid because she knows she can't take care of herself any more.

Ask the doctor to refer you to someone who can prescribe an antidepressant. I know a lot of people think you are "weak" if you need them, but they CAN help so much. She is in a lot of pain emotionally, and can't really use her mind to deal with it.

As anyone here can tell you, elders need to look out for side effects from any medication. Start with a small dose and go up slowly. The first medication may not work, but keep trying. There are a lot of things to try, and one will work in the end. Good luck to you both.
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