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Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
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He is in Charlotte, NC, she is in the U.P. of Michigan. He's declining quickly. I can only imagine the sorrow, as I also lost my son when he was 24... but some of you who have been through this, please share..... thank you.
Sorry to hear about your brother's illness. How bad off is your mom? Is the dementia such that she will not remember if you tell her about him? If so, it might be better not to say anything. Here's my reasoning behind it: my uncle (also lived in the U.P. - small world) had dementia to the point where he didn't remember anyone in the family unless you explained who you were - then his eyes would light up with recognition and he would talk to you animatedly - for all of about 5 minutes. Then his eyes would dim, and he would ask who you were again. When my father died (his only brother), we insisted that he be told. We didn't live close by, so a cousin who was caring for him did it for us, but told us they didn't think it was a good idea. I wish we'd listened to him. He told our uncle that his brother had died, and of course, he was very sad. Then he forgot and would ask about his brother, or say, "I haven't had a letter from him lately, I wonder if he's ok..." - and then he would have a brief moment of clarity and say, "Oh...he died, didn't he?" - and then he'd feel the loss all over again. It was very, very hard on him.
If your mom's dementia is such that she won't remember from one day to the next what has been told to her, I wouldn't tell her. If you feel she is still in her right mind enough to understand and deal with the grief, then you'll need to decide if this is the right thing to do. Just my personal experience and opinion, but I don't see the benefit to telling them something that can only cause them repeated pain when they forget and have to be told again and again.
I vote NO (not that I get a vote! : - )) I am guessing that he is not a regular visitor that she would miss seeing. If your Mom is like many folks with dementia, she will either obsess over this news or immediately forget and (possibly) need to be retold. Truly, there isn't much she can do! Even when my Mom mentioned my Dad who had been gone 30+ years, I never mentioned that he was dead. I said he was at a meeting or working late. I'm more for keeping the seniors calm. As an aside - - - a friend's mom had dementia. When her husband passed away, they brought her to the services. She would walk up to the casket screech in horror and cry uncontrollably. The family would lead her to the back of the room and calm her down. This scene repeated itself over the entire visitation period. I wouldn't want to put anyone through this angst. I'm sorry about your Mom and brother. Sending hugs.
Excellent..... it is true. She will forget within a few hours, and it will have done no good for her to know. I forgot about the aspect that if she hears about it again, it will be like repeating the pain all over again. I think this is great advice. Thank you so much.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Sorry to hear about your brother's illness. How bad off is your mom? Is the dementia such that she will not remember if you tell her about him? If so, it might be better not to say anything. Here's my reasoning behind it: my uncle (also lived in the U.P. - small world) had dementia to the point where he didn't remember anyone in the family unless you explained who you were - then his eyes would light up with recognition and he would talk to you animatedly - for all of about 5 minutes. Then his eyes would dim, and he would ask who you were again. When my father died (his only brother), we insisted that he be told. We didn't live close by, so a cousin who was caring for him did it for us, but told us they didn't think it was a good idea. I wish we'd listened to him. He told our uncle that his brother had died, and of course, he was very sad. Then he forgot and would ask about his brother, or say, "I haven't had a letter from him lately, I wonder if he's ok..." - and then he would have a brief moment of clarity and say, "Oh...he died, didn't he?" - and then he'd feel the loss all over again. It was very, very hard on him.
If your mom's dementia is such that she won't remember from one day to the next what has been told to her, I wouldn't tell her. If you feel she is still in her right mind enough to understand and deal with the grief, then you'll need to decide if this is the right thing to do. Just my personal experience and opinion, but I don't see the benefit to telling them something that can only cause them repeated pain when they forget and have to be told again and again.
As an aside - - - a friend's mom had dementia. When her husband passed away, they brought her to the services. She would walk up to the casket screech in horror and cry uncontrollably. The family would lead her to the back of the room and calm her down. This scene repeated itself over the entire visitation period. I wouldn't want to put anyone through this angst. I'm sorry about your Mom and brother. Sending hugs.