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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
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She has not been diagnosed with dementia, but I am sadly thinking she is showing signs. Thank you for responding. She insists on living alone but I think this is about to change.
My mother with moderate dementia even insists the caregivers at her Memory Care ALF are stealing her DEPENDS, for petesake. As if young girls would have a need or an interest in disposable briefs.
Goes with the territory, I'm afraid. Let it all go in one ear and out the other as there's no other choice when dementia is involved.
My mom thinks if you take out her trash you have 'stolen' from her.
She recently gathered all her courage and told me she doesn't want me to 'clean' her apartment anymore, because I 'touch' things.
I said "That's called 'dusting' mom." But I agreed that I will no longer even GO into her apartment and we can visit in the common living room.
She swears that YB's family steals from her, but they are just making sure that 100's of boxes of puzzles and stacks of books and piles of newspapers are stacked so she has a safe walkway.
Probably the second most frequent post we get. When you think about it, people who have failing minds focus on whatever if foremost in their lives and minds, and often that comes down to the daily thought of living worrying about money. How to spend it, how to save it, what best to do with it, and will be always have it. It can become an obsession in age that covers money and "stuff" as well. We mislay things, and we think it is taken from us. I often makes jokes about the fact that MIL always thought her housekeeper, Wilma, was taking her stuff. Weekly it would be something or other missing and the litany of "Wilma took it". Now, at 78 and 80, as my partner and I increasingly mislay something or other we know we will come across we are constantly laughing and saying to one another "Wilma took it". There is little you can do about this but reassure her. My own brother, who kept almost ALL his mentation intact during his diagnosis of probable early Lewy's Dementia, and until his death, did begin to be paranoid about two things and that was believing someone stole from him and he knew who did it (later found wrapped in his own white towel stack) and that people were entering his room at his ALF without his permission. We all know that there are people so nefarious they will prey upon helpless seniors. This isn't helped by the fact that even when they have no thieves about, they still believe people are taking their "stuff".
You don't mention in your profile if mom has been diagnosed with any cognitive decline, as paranoia is very common with Alzheimer's and some of the dementias. There are several different medications, called neuroleptics, or antipsychotics, that can help with her confusion, if she has either of those diagnosis'.
If that's not the issue and this new behavior has come on suddenly, perhaps have her checked for a UTI, as that can cause lots of mental confusion. Wishing you the best, as I know it must be hard when you are states away from where she is.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Goes with the territory, I'm afraid. Let it all go in one ear and out the other as there's no other choice when dementia is involved.
Good luck!
She recently gathered all her courage and told me she doesn't want me to 'clean' her apartment anymore, because I 'touch' things.
I said "That's called 'dusting' mom." But I agreed that I will no longer even GO into her apartment and we can visit in the common living room.
She swears that YB's family steals from her, but they are just making sure that 100's of boxes of puzzles and stacks of books and piles of newspapers are stacked so she has a safe walkway.
It's really a relief.
I often makes jokes about the fact that MIL always thought her housekeeper, Wilma, was taking her stuff. Weekly it would be something or other missing and the litany of "Wilma took it". Now, at 78 and 80, as my partner and I increasingly mislay something or other we know we will come across we are constantly laughing and saying to one another "Wilma took it".
There is little you can do about this but reassure her. My own brother, who kept almost ALL his mentation intact during his diagnosis of probable early Lewy's Dementia, and until his death, did begin to be paranoid about two things and that was believing someone stole from him and he knew who did it (later found wrapped in his own white towel stack) and that people were entering his room at his ALF without his permission.
We all know that there are people so nefarious they will prey upon helpless seniors. This isn't helped by the fact that even when they have no thieves about, they still believe people are taking their "stuff".
If that's not the issue and this new behavior has come on suddenly, perhaps have her checked for a UTI, as that can cause lots of mental confusion. Wishing you the best, as I know it must be hard when you are states away from where she is.