My 81 year old mom, who is having more difficulty recently with using the toilet on her own is very embarrased about her aide of 5 years being there to assist her if she is having a bowel movement. As a result of this she took a fall recently and then a near fall. I along with the aide have tried to explain to her that she should leave the door open the entire time so that the aide can assist her. She is embarrased about odors, noises etc. She alsouses Depends and that makes the process a bit more involved for her to do on her own now. We just changed from a standard commode with legs to a raised toilet seat with handles on it to avoid having legs in there that she can trip over. The window is not easy for the aide to get to and not practical during cold weather. The walker is kept outside the bathroom since it is too big for the small bathroom. I am wondering if a 4 prong cane would help her while she is in the actual bathroom. I was thinking about maybe having a bathroom fan put in, but not sure if they are really helpful? I thought it might make her less self conscious for the odor, noises, etc. Has anyone had a similar situation?
I'm afraid it is just a matter of getting used to it. The aide can help by making no comment at all ever about anything and just behaving as if it's all the most natural thing in the world. But anything has got to be better than risking both a broken hip and a toilet "accident" at the same time…
telling me how to make a wind spinner out of soda cans while he did his thing...any topic will do..good luck
I wouldn't risk another cane, the aide is there to assist in your mom's daily routine. Since the aide has been with your mom for 5 years what has your mom done up till now?
When one of my patients needs to have a BM they're usually so used to having someone around my presence doesn't phase them. That's where your mom needs to be. I'm going to assume that your aide has reassured her over and over that it's OK, that it's the human body, that we all do it. I've come across some stinky stuff in my day and I have never reacted. I'll talk to the person, put them at ease.
Does the aide wait outside the bathroom once your mom sits down? Once your mom is safely on the commode the aide should step out of the room a few feet so she's not seen but she's there if your mom needs her. Your mom deserves some dignity even while having a bowel movement. She should be able to poop in peace. :-)
I also keep the TV on when changing his pamper. It helps cover the uncomfortable situation of cleaning his very personal body parts. Maybe you can have one of those bathroom radios hanging in the bathroom. It will help fill out the "dead air".
The fan is also good. Are you able to install it on top of the wall? My brother did that. He bought a fan from Kmart, and then installed it on the wall. When we turn on the top light, it also turns on the fan - which is aimed directly to the toilet area.