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my mother threatens to take my stuff away tells me god can hear and see me do bad things and that if I cuss I will go to hell she is scareing me and I am so confussed what can I do
Well God CAN hear and see you, that's a given. But it's WHY she sees the need to drive that fact down your throat that I don't get. You're not a little girl anymore, so tell her to bug off. If she's so worried about you, tell her to pray for you instead of this method which isn't working.
If she has depression (which I see from your profile), maybe she needs to see her doc to get her meds adjusted? It's also possible she's got some medical condition that is causing her to flip out. Urinary tract infections can sometimes make elderly folks act pretty crazy. Your best bet is to get her to her doctor to see what's going on. Good luck!
Hi jackiehammack, What stuff is she threatening to take away?
Now listen to me--I don't like to preach because I am not so good at it and , really , we are all on our own path BUT in this instance I want to say this-- God loves you. You are not going to go to Hell if you cuss.
From what I have been taught and from what I believe is that to go to Hell you have to be really really really bad and hate God. And say "I am going to cuss because I hate God and God does not want me to cuss so I am going to cuss just to spite Him" and even if you DID say that you can still ask for forgiveness and be forgiven in an instant.
Please relax. And tell your Mom to relax. Maybe get her to a psychiatrist and get evaluated. Obsessing about God and sinning could be a sign of OCD-obsessive compulsive disorder . And that can be hard to live with. --very tough for you. But if you can get a diagnosis you can maybe get her on some meds and you can research OCD and find out information that can help you deal with her religiosity.
Hang in there. Take a nice warm bath and know that I am a pretty big sinner and plan on spending eternity in Heaven!
she is depressed she has been through a lot and I do not hate god I love god but she yells at me and tells to do things like clean the house yesterday I wanted captain d 's and she wanted hardees and I said u can still get hardees but no she did not want to go to two places at once but I told her I have not had captain d's in a long time and she yells at me YOU ALWAYS GET WH AT YOU WANT and that not true I have been getting what she wants and I told her that and she says I am not getting u nothing she threatens me and because for last few days I have been going to shoneys wendys and dairy queen and all I want is something for me at my favorit place so she needs to understand that she has to let me get what I want
Hi jackihammer, So you are not afraid of going to Hell? When I read your question I thought you were saying your Mom was scaring you by saying that you were going to Hell. Sorry if that is not what you meant. It sounds like you are just frustrated that your Mom is yelling and trying to control you. As an adult you can eat where ever you want. If it bothers her don't tell her. If she asks just tell her kindly that you have it under control and then ask her if she needs anything? If Mom is not disabled, per se, and the living arrangement is not working out perhaps it is time to move out.
we can to a agreement we got captain d's and now this morning was bad she woke me up to go to cracker barrel or shoneys with her and I told her I wanted to go to cracker barrel with her because you n get lunch little did I know it was breakfast time and she says to me In a hateful way I told you we should have gone to shoneys you could have gotten lunch there I told her they only severed breakfast in the mornings and she says why do you think they get out the lunch menus I said because it has breakfast on it so they will not serve lunch and when we arrived at cracker barrel she says you might as well stay in the truck if you are going to be mean and I won't let you have anything she is mean to me she threatens me I can not stand this abuse anymore I am nice to her but she thinks I am hateful
It sounds likes, to me, that you too are just bickering. Bickering is normal to a certain extent when you live with someone. It just means you need to talk with each other about how each of you feels. And make up a plan about who gets to decide what on what day. For instance--on Mondays maybe Mom gets to choose where to eat and on Tuesdays you get to choose where to eat .....Make a chart that says that and both of you sign it in agreement and then if she says "NO today I want to go to Captain D's" you can say " No, today is Tuesday and it is my choice and I choose Cracker Barrel " and show her her signature that shows she agreed to let you choose on certain days. then tell her that the next day you will gladly go where she wants.
If she starts yelling at you just walk away. Tell her you will not stand by her and liisten to her yelling. Tell her when she can be nicer you will talk with her.
Don't forget to be nice to her too. Little things are important. Does she like a certain flower? or treat? Maybe buy her some flowers or the treat. Show her how to be kind. Sometimes if you start doing nice things than the other person will too. Also tell her you love her --and do not expect her to say it back. Just say it to make her feel better. Or tell her she looks pretty. Or something like that. It will show her that you care and teach her how to be kind.
Sounds to me like mom is too overbearing. A day program for her may be helpful at least a few days a week. You could even mention it to her doctor ahead of time and let the doctor tell her he recommends it. Nurses and doctors are there for caregivers and will help. U need time to yourself to recharge and go do whatever you want
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
What stuff is she threatening to take away?
Now listen to me--I don't like to preach because I am not so good at it and , really , we are all on our own path BUT in this instance I want to say this--
God loves you. You are not going to go to Hell if you cuss.
From what I have been taught and from what I believe is that to go to Hell you have to be really really really bad and hate God. And say "I am going to cuss because I hate God and God does not want me to cuss so I am going to cuss just to spite Him" and even if you DID say that you can still ask for forgiveness and be forgiven in an instant.
Please relax. And tell your Mom to relax. Maybe get her to a psychiatrist and get evaluated. Obsessing about God and sinning could be a sign of OCD-obsessive compulsive disorder . And that can be hard to live with. --very tough for you. But if you can get a diagnosis you can maybe get her on some meds and you can research OCD and find out information that can help you deal with her religiosity.
Hang in there. Take a nice warm bath and know that I am a pretty big sinner and plan on spending eternity in Heaven!
If Mom is not disabled, per se, and the living arrangement is not working out perhaps it is time to move out.
Good luck
It sounds likes, to me, that you too are just bickering. Bickering is normal to a certain extent when you live with someone. It just means you need to talk with each other about how each of you feels. And make up a plan about who gets to decide what on what day. For instance--on Mondays maybe Mom gets to choose where to eat and on Tuesdays you get to choose where to eat .....Make a chart that says that and both of you sign it in agreement and then if she says "NO today I want to go to Captain D's" you can say " No, today is Tuesday and it is my choice and I choose Cracker Barrel " and show her her signature that shows she agreed to let you choose on certain days. then tell her that the next day you will gladly go where she wants.
If she starts yelling at you just walk away. Tell her you will not stand by her and liisten to her yelling. Tell her when she can be nicer you will talk with her.
Don't forget to be nice to her too. Little things are important. Does she like a certain flower? or treat? Maybe buy her some flowers or the treat. Show her how to be kind. Sometimes if you start doing nice things than the other person will too. Also tell her you love her --and do not expect her to say it back. Just say it to make her feel better. Or tell her she looks pretty. Or something like that. It will show her that you care and teach her how to be kind.
Good luck