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Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
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Paranoia of loss of money is one of the most common things in dementia. As to what you can do, you of course already know that your record keeping must be immaculate and correct on every single penny in and every penny out of Mother's assets. So you have your records. Secondly--and this is what I did for my brother--You can give your Mother a copy of her monthly report just as though you were her well paid accountant. She has a looseleaf binder into which she can clip this report. She has her own small account if she is capable of handling that, and you handle EVERYTHING else. It got so my brother didn't even ask or look at his sheet. We only discussed money when I wanted to know who to make POD if a new CD was being opened in his name. Wishing you luck. Not everything has an answer and this may be something you just need to live with. An occ. trip with her to your/her bank might help so the manager in the branch can tell her what a "good job" you are doing.
Is your mother's paranoia spilling out to other people? Is she telling this delusion to others in your family or social circle or on social media? If so, this is a different issue.
I agree with AlvaDeer to give her printouts. Although my mother isn't totally paranoid, she is nervous about trusting others to manage her money so I make sure to give her printouts of her statements and this satisfies her.
Unless these accusations are causing you legal trouble of some sort, I'd ignore them completely. Giving a dementia patient printouts of your record keeping/bank statements/checks etc. is a waste of time b/c if she had the ability to understand the information contained on those statements, she'd also have the ability to understand you are not stealing from her.
Trying to use 'logic' and 'reason' with a person who's saddled with Alz/dementia serves no purpose at all. We cannot apply OUR rules of normalcy to them; they have a brain disease that prevents them from understanding much of anything. Paranoia and accusations of this kind are par for the course, unfortunately, especially with loved ones who do the MOST for them.
Let all the nonsense go in one ear and out the other & change the subject/use distraction techniques when the accusations start. If you have family members giving you a hard time about it, tell THEM to take care of mother's entire LIFE and let you know how they like doing so!
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
As to what you can do, you of course already know that your record keeping must be immaculate and correct on every single penny in and every penny out of Mother's assets. So you have your records.
Secondly--and this is what I did for my brother--You can give your Mother a copy of her monthly report just as though you were her well paid accountant. She has a looseleaf binder into which she can clip this report. She has her own small account if she is capable of handling that, and you handle EVERYTHING else. It got so my brother didn't even ask or look at his sheet. We only discussed money when I wanted to know who to make POD if a new CD was being opened in his name.
Wishing you luck. Not everything has an answer and this may be something you just need to live with. An occ. trip with her to your/her bank might help so the manager in the branch can tell her what a "good job" you are doing.
I agree with AlvaDeer to give her printouts. Although my mother isn't totally paranoid, she is nervous about trusting others to manage her money so I make sure to give her printouts of her statements and this satisfies her.
Trying to use 'logic' and 'reason' with a person who's saddled with Alz/dementia serves no purpose at all. We cannot apply OUR rules of normalcy to them; they have a brain disease that prevents them from understanding much of anything. Paranoia and accusations of this kind are par for the course, unfortunately, especially with loved ones who do the MOST for them.
Let all the nonsense go in one ear and out the other & change the subject/use distraction techniques when the accusations start. If you have family members giving you a hard time about it, tell THEM to take care of mother's entire LIFE and let you know how they like doing so!