My Mother is in a memory care nursing home in VT and my sister has guardianship. I live in Texas and am thinking about bringing my mom into our home thinking she will thrive better in a family setting. How easy is it to get guardianship in Texas? If my wife quits her job to stay with her is she able to get compensated through my mother?
You will also need to make your home elder proof. Is there a bedroom and bath on the main floor? Are there grab bars in the tub/shower and at the toilet? Are the hallways and doorway wide enough for a walker or wheelchair? If you have thick carpeting and padding, that would need to be replaced as it is difficult to walk with a walker on such carpeting. Please note, falls will happen. Are there steps up to the front door or from the garage, if so, a ramp might be needed. The list goes on and on.
Please note that 40% of caregivers die leaving behind the person they were caring. Those are terrible odds. What if something happens to your wife? Would you be willing to quit your job and be your Mother's full-time 168 hour a week caregiver?
I would talk with her physician about how much longer care at home (with LOTS of home health care help coming in) is going to be feasible. Are you (and your wife) really up for doubke incontinence?
Please check out these excellent articles about Dementia/Alzheimer's to help give you an idea of what the future will be like, mainly for your wife. Go to the blue bar near the top of the page, click on SENIOR LIVING, now click on Alzheimer's CARE, now scroll down to the articles.
I think it is wonderful that you want your mother to be as happy as possible. Too often we lose the human-ness of the elder with dementia. I am glad that you still see that. If your sister has been with her in VT, I would listen to the things that she says about her condition and work together to accomplish what you feel is best for your mother.
If you'll let us know a bit more about your mother, her history, and why she is in memory care, someone may have ideas about what might be best or possible. The main goal would be to keep your mother as safe and content as possible under unfortunate circumstances.