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My Mom grew up on a farm and they had no indoor plumbing when she was a child. The only thing I can come up with is that she used a pot next to the bed at night time. Lately at night I have found that she is using the trash can to go to the bathroom. Has anyone else had this problem? I don't know if I should say something to her or just let it go, I know she has no idea or can't believe she does she use to be so clean and its not that she is not clean now but doing very odd things such as this. Do I just clean it up and let it go or do I try and discuss this with her. I just wonder if it will do any good to say anything. I have had issues with her bathing and when I tell her she has not taken a bath in a few days she will argue with me and tell me I have no idea what she does and that she took a bath yesterday when I know she did not.

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Let it go. Lose the trash can and invest in a bedside commode.
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Oh WOW, believe it or not I have never even though of that. What a good idea!!! I did remove the trash can from her room this weekend after finding a terrible mess inside. I guess sometimes your just so shocked that it takes someone else to help you make sense of it all and come up with a simple solution. I try at all cost to not embarrass Mom I know when she was in her right mind this would NEVER be a possibility, My sister tells me to tell her and show her what she has done but I know it will only embarrass her and I in no way want to do that. I would rather just take care of it as to not let her know that maybe she did that but I did not know if I was handling the situation correct. Again thank you for such a simple but bright idea.
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Does you Mom have Dementia? My Nana used to do this too. I do think that some of it may stem from the long ago memory's of pre indoor plumbing.
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It's difficult to figure out behavior with cognitive decline and dementia. It could be that she's become afraid to leave her bedroom at night. Or that she feels safer than sitting on a toilet. Or, it could be that she is having delusions that this is the correct way to do use the bathroom at night. Arguing, convincing, etc. won't work most of the time. I'd leave it alone. I would try to accommodate, as gladimhere said and adopt the bedside commode, if she will accept it. If not, I'd let her keep the trash can.

The bathing issue is much of the same. You won't convince her that she's not bathing. But, what I did was just stop talking about it. I would just run the water, lather the wash cloth and hand it to her, saying, when you're finished bathing, we are going to have the must fun, listening to music, going for a ride, having ice cream, etc. I didn't discuss it or give any option. It's tough, but works sometimes. There are a lot of threads on this site about the refusal to bathe issue. You can get many tips that might help, such as hiring a bath aid. Sadly, it's a tough issue.
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If she's using a trash can, line it with a plastic bag so when the bag is full, it can be liftted up out the trash can, tied up and put in regular trash for garbage day.
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