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Our septuagenarian mother (diagnosed with Alzheimer's last year) is currently eating one gallon of ice cream every 2 to 3 days. How have other families helped restrict / limit intake to reduce her risk of obesity, hyperlipidemia, hyperglycemia, dental caries, etc? It is her one joy in life so we also don't want to take that away from her.

Basically, when we get into the youngsters trying to control our diet I rebel.
I am 82. If I want to eat an entire bag of Trader Joe's Original Potato Chips OR an ENTIRE box of ice cream sandwiches, that is up to ME.
PUH-LEEZE.
Am I not of an age? To decide WHAT I EAT and when? To decide how much?

Are you now the parent who will dole out the sweets?
Please kill me first.

I have to say, having thought long and hard on this one, having seem the "youngsters" now in their 60s trying to control our diets so we can live another 1/23 decade in misery? Why? What for?

l just ask you.
THINK ABOUT IT.
Please. I beg you. Please.
Helpful Answer (17)
Reply to AlvaDeer
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Beatty Aug 30, 2024
Agree - but you are independant still Alva! So your biz! No-one elses.

My LO shops, buys, serves own icecream in own home. So her biz too. At home.

However, when out at a regular function where moring tea was served to many, this became a situation that needed 'food policing'. My LO would sit next to the shared biscuit plate & keep eating with no impuse control. There was a young man with TBI that would do same. Staff would never be harsh but would manage this discretely by serving individual portions to these people, then moving the plate out of reach & view of them. Requests for more would need delay & distract tactics.
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Why are you worried about  obesity, hyperlipidemia, hyperglycemia, or dental issues? She has a terminal disease and will linger for even more years if you start worrying about and address any of these potential health issues.

Let her eat what she wants. Why prolong her life?
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Reply to Hothouseflower
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Anxietynacy Aug 29, 2024
I agree, I'm just thinking it's probably easier on the caregiver to keep the weight down a little. Easier to help them get around and less appointments.
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I vote for letting your mother eat whatever she darn well wants. I mean hasn't she earned that right at her age? Let her have her "one joy in life."
I better not have either of my children tell me what I should or shouldn't be eating when I get older. Heck they better not try telling me now at my young age of 65.

One of the ladies in my caregiver support group whose mother lived to be 102, shares often how her mother who had Alzheimer's, lived on just ice-cream and cashews for the last 5 years of her life.
Now that is the kind of a diet that I want to be on the last 5 years of my life. I'm just saying.
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Reply to funkygrandma59
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Why worry about your mothers health? She's already terminally ill, unfortunately. With AD and dementia, they love sweets. And ice cream is THE #1 comfort food on earth. Every time there's a crisis in our family, my daughter and I go out and buy ice cream to consume in mass quantities. True story.

In any event, buy pint size tubs of ice cream once a week and call it a day. If she cries for more, either deal with it or buy more.

Fwiw, I used to pray daily for God to take my mother who suffered from dementia. I'd bring her bags of chocolate and cookies at her Memory Care ALF because she loved sweets and had spent her whole life dieting. She ordered ice cream 2x a day, for lunch and dinner dessert. In her old age, she gained about 50 lbs. at least. So I bought her pretty clothes in bigger sizes.
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Reply to lealonnie1
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I'm assuming your Mother is in her home or someone else's and not in a facility? Otherwise who is providing the ice cream to her?

I think she should still have her ice cream but whoever is the on-hands person providing her care can perhaps switch to ice cream bars or sandwiches so that she has a finite amount she can eat at a time (and hide the rest from her). Also consider frozen yogurt or non-dairy ones (there are some tasty ones out there). Would she eat a sundae? Like adding a fresh banana and nuts to one bowl a day?

More info would be helpful.
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Reply to Geaton777
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Not sure where she is with her diagnosis but she could be around for many, many years. The 20lb weight gain would concern me too with all the added medical problems (and the associated discomfort that comes along with it) that you may have to juggle along with the Alzheimer's.

Is she going out still and buying it for herself? Not much you can do except try to counsel her about it.

If someone is enabling her, stop it. There's a few good suggestions here about limiting her without taking it away. She SHOULD be able to enjoy it if she wants. I love ice cream. If I was dying and someone took it away I'd probably throw my diaper against the wall until I got it back.

If she's declining quickly and you believe she's going to pass away relatively soon I'd just let her have it. Hospice will enter the scene eventually and none of the other issues will matter anyway.
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Reply to Sha1911
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This is just me, but I feel that once someone hits age 75, they can pretty much eat, drink, or smoke as much as they want.
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Hothouseflower Aug 29, 2024
Yes that’s when I’m breaking loose 😁
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I would substitute the gallon of presumably regular ice cream for low sugar and low fat half gallons or quarts, and include fruit in a sundae style, or incorporate fruit and protein powder into a smoothie or shake. Breyers makes a low carb low-fat option starting at 60 calories a scoop, compared to 340 calories for Ben and Jerry’s. The latter may make you fat; the former has fewer calories than an apple.
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Reply to PeggySue2020
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LoopyLoo Aug 29, 2024
…. But be careful with low sugar or substitute sugar ice cream. Some of these artificial sweeteners will cause diarrhea. Like Niagara Falls. Don’t ask how I know.
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I can only say do not worry about it. She is getting calories, she is enjoying herself and if you were at the end of your life journey would you want your food intake restricted? It's a hard concept to come to grips with but in the end it will ultimately not matter.
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Reply to LindaSG
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BurntCaregiver Sep 6, 2024
@LindaSG

Yes, I believe I would want my food restricted unless my checkout time was looming very near.

I know what it's like to have been morbidly obese. With mobility issues this is going to cause a lot more pain and suffering than a little dietary restriction.

I was a homecare worker for 25 years. Let me tell you thin people with mobility issues and incontinence who don't have dementia are hard enough to keep clean and dry. Even with the best and most frequent hygiene care they still get skin breakdown, fungal skin infections, incontinence sores, UTI's, and yeast infections.

Add obesity to the job and the odds of getting these conditions really increase and hygiene care becomes impossible in private residence. Many times size is rhe deciding factor of why a person gets placed in facility care versus being kept in their home.

So yes, I'd rather have calorie restriction and die in my beautiful home then be allowed to stuff myself with ice cream in a nursing home.
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Alright I'll crash the gate here. What is the problem? Let her have five gallons a Day if she wants it! You're welcome
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Reply to gemswinner12
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drbjoefnp Aug 29, 2024
Sorry if I offended you with my question, we are truly worried about her health so dropping the F-bomb on a stressful situation is not needed.
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