Follow
Share

She is on an anti-depressant, Namenda, and Ativan, plus a few other pills/vitamins. She takes these in the morning. I go over every morning before work but she can be incredibly slow and if I wait around to make sure she takes them, I am late for work, sometimes up to an hour late. And she won't listen or take them for my dad. Once or twice she has even hid them. She questions every pill, what it is what it is for, and argues about the number of pills she takes. She is getting very belligerent about it. At night she takes Namenda and Zyprexa. Once she started refusing to take her evening pills, we started crushing them and mixing in her food. She eats cereal for breakfast, so that's not an option in the morning. I don't know how to handle this. She has been doing better most days since we got her on this regimen, but I'm afraid if she goes off them we will have a real battle on our hands again. Her and my dad still live at home. We take them supper and do the housework and have someone with them a few afternoons and every evening. All family members, and we are all stressed out and exhausted. Dad has declined having someone come in on a regular basis, he knows mom will fight it and blame him. How can I help or do more? We are fresh out of ideas!

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
My Mom wouldn't take her pills in applesauce, so the nurse tried chocolate ice cream, that did the trick. What was interesting, any time we tried to have Mom eat chocolate ice cream for desert [without the pills] she didn't like the taste :P

Now a days there are "compounding pharmacies" that will make the pill from scratch and include flavors to make the pill more like candy. Now, this is expensive and not all Rx insurance will pay for this process.

Another idea is to see if the pills come in liquid form, that can be added to drinks.

I know what you mean by being stressed out. Our parents want to continue with their own lifestyle while we need to change ours. My Mom refused caregivers/cleaning staff. I tried caregivers for 3 days and it was just too stressful for my Dad as Mom was arguing with him saying they didn't need this help.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

Get once a day meds. Namenda comes in a once a day formulation. So do antidepressants. Get an extended release like Klonopin instead of Ativan. In the AM, just give her the vitamins and let her take them if she chooses. She wants the ability to choose.
Helpful Answer (6)
Report

I did the same as Pam. Gave her the choice to only take the necessary ones. Usually later in the day before a snack I would casually say can you do me a favor and take these pills then I can get you some rice pudding. Worked all the time.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

Home health agencies might be able to send a nurse for medication management, covered by medicare with no charge to them or you, if that might be an option. You might ask her primary physician if that sounds like something that might work.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

We have it pared down to 5 pills daily and do them after lunch or later in the afternoon. I also say "do me a favor" as above and then thank her afterwards. It's working for now but can still be a battle
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

You can eliminate the ones she really doesn't need.
As you are handing them to her and she questions them you could take the vitamin and say..you are right you don't need this one now..but you do need these....
If you can get the vitamin in later great but if not don't stress about it.
I crush my husbands meds and put them in his cereal without a problem. Or I will crush them and put them in a bit of banana or applesauce.
Thankfully I have never had a problem getting him to take most meds. (He will not take a gel cap though)
As far as vitamin pills if she is getting a balanced diet there probably is no need for a vitamin. And if it is causing problems just eliminate as many pills as you can.
As has been suggested by many try to get as many as you can in 1 a day doses, extended release or some even come as a patch you can put on. (You have to make sure it stays on and that it comes off and is discarded properly, often a patch will stay on when another is put on so there is a slight chance of an over dose)
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

My dad started questioning what the pills were and it became a battle. I ended the battle, he's been taking them for a few years without knowing either in a milkshake or even better in peanut butter in a sandwich. No more battle!
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

You can get all drugs in liquid form. I mix them with warmed Ensure with a little sugar. My wife loves her morning 'tea'. All my wife's nine pills cost $350/month copay. The same drugs in liquid form cost $270/month. These are not just pills crushed up. Ask your doctor for prescriptions for liquid drugs and find your local pharmacy that can provide them. They give you a little syringe to measure the dosage. Some of them need to be refrigerated. For me, giving drugs five times a day was a nightmare for me and my wife. Now it's enjoyable. Good luck.
Helpful Answer (6)
Report

PS. I even get her multivitamins in liquid form.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

What makes you think an antidepressant, vitamins or any other pill is going to erase the fact she has a terminal illness? She can take her pills or not. It will not matter. Don't sweat the small stuff!
Helpful Answer (7)
Report

Since my mom was diagnosed with swallowing issues, I have been crushing her pills and putting them in pudding. My mom is an extremely picky eater and now that everything has to be extremely soft and it has to be sweet, of course, pudding seems to be the trick for now. I asked her doctor about liquid forms of her medication. Has anyone ever asked the doctor a question and get the look back like you have 5 heads, LOL , well that's what I got when I asked her doctor the question. I don't find the system to be very helpful in trying to figure alternatives when you have limitations to overcome. Places like this site and others are far more helpful.
My mom fought me on bringing help in, but for some reason if I said I needed the help around the house, etc. she would be ok with it. She is now 81 and in the later stages of dementia and she is still picky about who is around her. Although better, not great and because she can't verbally communicate her feelings she has a tendency to strike out physically. So, then it came down to finding the right person(s) who can deal with that type of behavior. It is possible, but not easy. Good Luck, we are all with you in spirit :)
Helpful Answer (5)
Report

Sorry I have to disagree with ferris1. I know first hand that medication can have a huge impact on behavior. Not taking something could lead to the person becoming violent or agitated and if she is with her elderly husband, she could even hurt him. Just because they have a mental or terminal illness also doesn't mean you want them to suffer a heart attack, go into a diabetic comma or suffer a stroke. That would make it 10 times harder on the caregivers. Sometimes these pills are necessary to prevent further suffering or the keep the patient stable.
Helpful Answer (7)
Report

yes, this is a big deal...ive been there! anyway...not sure how you mash your pills, but at the pharmacy they have these small grinders for pills that turn that pill into almost powderlike! you can put it in small amounts of food like yogurt...or whatever she likes to eat. i say small amounts just in case she doesn't feel like eating to much. but...you can pretty much put that powder like substance in anything! good luck...and let us know what worked for you!
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Be careful, not all pills shoul be crushed! Check with her pharmacist!
Helpful Answer (4)
Report

Do not crush any oral medication that is labeled as:
Delayed Release
Enteric-coated (EC)
Extended release
Effervescent tablet (EVT)
Mucous Membrane irritant (MMI)
Orally Disintegrating tablets (ODT)
Slow-release (SR)
Sublingual forms of drugs
Sustained-release

Do not crush any oral medication that ends in the following letters:
CD CR ER LA SR XL XR XT
Helpful Answer (6)
Report

For multi vits use gummies. Give them as candy. For meds crush and put in something she likes . Do it when she is not looking so there is no battle. This is a big problem for many of us.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Can you speak to the pharmacist? Find out when a least busy time is, and pose your question to him/her. They know how different drugs are packaged, alternatives, generics, liquids, if pills can be crushed, dosages, etc. Physicians do not always know these things.

I know for my pharmacist, Mondays, and Fridays are the busy times. Also lunch times. I wish you all the best and hope you find some solutions that work best for you and your loved ones.
Helpful Answer (4)
Report

Physicians do not know most of the things pharmacists do. That's why pharmacists study at pharmacy school and doctors at medical school. If you are looking to a physician to help you manage your dad's meds, you're barking up the wrong tree. Write out your questions for the pharmacist, hand it to him or her, and ask when would be a good time for you to return to discuss.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

I have had pretty good success with Mom by doing a few things.

1) I have a daily pill dispenser so that none of the pills are in their original containers for Mom to see. Therefore:

2) They are all "Vitamins" to keep you healthy, because I/we want to keep you around as long as we can! C - to ward off colds. D - for your bones and teeth. B - for energy, heart health, joint health, eyesight, … make it up as you go if you have to…

3) I take mine at the same time she takes hers, even though mine are just vitamins. We can all probably use more Vitamin D, or another Tic Tac!

4) Triage. I have Mom take the most important ones first… meaning the actual medication… followed by the vitamins, etc.

Good luck!
Helpful Answer (4)
Report

Robinf, good answer!
Nydaughter, great information, as Always!
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Donna F. instead of asking the dr for alternate liquid meds, ask a pharmacist....if a med needed doesn't come as a liquid, the pharmacist would be able suggest an alternative medication which comes in liquid form.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Luckily for me my mother is good about taking all her pills, years of being told by doctors that she will die without them (statins). It has been a challenge to make she she takes them and does not double dose. Those daily pill boxes have been a help. And there is one large one that can be crushed, that goes into strawberry jelly or jam (tip from Teepa Snow).so she won't choke.

Some days she gets annoyed at having to take the pills and said "what if I just stop taking them", and I said, "well, that is an option, but then your potassium and magnesium will drop to dangerously low levels and you will go into a coma and die. So it's not a good option, but it is an option". She took the pills.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Thanks everyone for your helpful advice and comments! I do have a pill crusher, which we use at night and mix with her supper. Have been trying to avoid using it in the morning, only because it would be much more difficult. She only eats cereal for breakfast and drinks hot tea. Applesauce, juice, pudding, canned fruit are all hit or miss. Some days she will eat, other days she won't. We took away her multi-vitamin and that has helped a little, since the other pills are all small in size. But this is still an on-going battle. We are checking into finding a smaller size vitamin or even a liquid. She has always had trouble swallowing pills. I appreciate Nolagal's comment, she understands where I am coming from. We know we cannot reverse this illness, we are not trying to. But we do want to keep her calm and as content as she can be. She still lives at home with my father, and we want to keep it that way as long as we can provide a safe place for her. And him. Her taking her pills on a regular schedule is a big part of that. I don't like her taking so many different pills, but IMO, it's for her benefit. Most days she is calmer, and less agitated and less likely to leave the house to walk "home" or go off looking for her parents or make 20 trips up and down the basement steps.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

like others said, I would talk with doctor and get a liquid form that way it can be hid in her juice, coffee or whatever she likes to drink. and yes it does matter if she does take them. my father in NH where others can be very distraught, if they don't take the meds they get really loud and anxious and screaming due to the anxiety they feel. why put them thru that stress. its bad enough they don't remember a lot of stuff............no the meds won't keep the disease from getting worse, but it will help soften the anxiety and stress for them and those around them. good luck
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

PAlynn: Tell her pharmacist that you need liquid form. Also find a pharmacy with a locking bottle and/or one with a clock on top so that YOU can monitor when it was opened last.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Sometimes bad behavior in seniors can be due to a urinary tract infection brought on by grains/milk/sugar. I had a battle on my hands five years ago with my Mom with dementia when she came to live with me, but she would take no meds (because of her religion) and I found that once I cleared up the UTI and got her off the bread and pasta that her personality was just so sweet and cooperative that I sometimes wondered if my whole life with her might have been easier if she left the grains out of her diet! Lots of water, water/cranberry juice, water-filled foods, and if necessary, D-Mannose powder rather than antibiotics/probiotics. Also, please note that moods can vary from day to day.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter