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My mother had 2 strokes 6 months ago. Memorial Herman of The Woodlands never sent her to therapy. I brought her home; she couldn’t walk and fell several times. The last time she got hurt so I took her to the hospital. She was sent to a therapy place, but I guess was too late, so she was sent home. She’s bed ridden and we must feed her, scratch her, clean her, change diapers, etc. She gets social security and disability, but nursing homes said no medical necessity. She needs to go to a nursing home she has Medicaid and Medicare I’m 64 don’t know what to do I don’t have help, what do I do? I have been taking her to Regent care center in the Woodlands with no results. They said I must pay $5550 per month till mom’s long-term Medicaid is approved and that can take up to 90 days. I don’t have that kind of money! Her income is $900. Don’t know what to do. 😭🥺

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I have no answer. I thought my situation was bad😔. Much like yours, but I’m 63 and Mom is 85. She can’t walk, been bedridden for 3yrs.
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Reply to Di1961
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Why do you keep taking her back home? When someone say she is ready for discharge you should say that she is not safe. This is where the process of transfer to SNF occurs.. you do not pay. The Medicaid paperwork is done and payment goes retroactive for those 90 days.
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Reply to MACinCT
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Next time she falls or is sick call 911 Once she is in the hospital tell the case manager " I Can No Longer care for her Please help me find a Nursing home / rehab . " Usually they will help find a Place for them to go . If they try and Make you Pick her up Just say " Unsafe discharge I Do Not have the Capacity to care for her any Longer. I am exhausted . " Good Luck and take care of yourself . You are in a very stressful situation which is no Longer sustainable .
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Reply to KNance72
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Sadly there is no good answer. Like others have said, you need to refuse taking her home. You tell them in a polite but steadfast way that you are unable to safely take care of her needs. Now that you do have her, it is so much more difficult. You have to get her into the hospital first. You may need to use your imagination and plan to do it tactfully.
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Reply to mstrbill
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Next time she goes to the hospital use the terms “unsafe discharge” and document who you told it to and when. Those are the magic words.
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Reply to Southernwaver
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Does your Mom have no other assets? No home or car to sell? If she does, then it's time to sell these to pay for the care.

Does she have a PoA? If not, she needs to assign one so that someone can legally manager her affairs and make decisions in her best interests.

If she doesn't have a PoA -- and since she is bedridden -- you can go to Legalzoom.com or Rocketlawyer.com and download PoA paper for her home state. They have lawyers online you can consult with. You can probably find a notary to come to the house to finalize it, but you will need to know what your state requires during this signing: usually 2 non-family witnesses.

I'm hoping you're her PoA and that she has her other legal ducks in a row. I'm sorry you're in this difficult situation. I wish you all the best as you work to get the appropriate care for her.
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Reply to Geaton777
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Adding to what Waytomisery said...If you take her to the hospital or if you have to call 911..actually that is what you should do since she is bedridden when she gets to the hospital ask to talk to a Social Worker right away.
You tell the Social Worker that you can no longer SAFELY care for mom and that she can not be discharged to home as it is an "UNSAFE DISCHARGE" .
They legally can not discharge her into your care if you say you can not safely care for her at home.
If mom is Hospice eligible you can ask if there is a Hospice representative in the hospital and you can discuss with them the next steps.
Hospice would provide you with all the equipment that you would need to safely care for her and you would get a nurse that would come once a week and a CNA would come at least 2 times a week the CNA would order all the personal supplies you need, briefs, wipes, gloves, creams. Hospice also has a Social Worker that would help get mom placed if you can not care for her at home. Because it is Hospice the facility would be working with often Hospice can get a bed faster.
What ever you decide do NOT take mom home next time she has to go to the ER
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Reply to Grandma1954
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Stop taking Mom home when she is in the hospital . Tell them it’s an “ unsafe discharge” . Use those words .

You tell them you can not take care of her and they will have to find a nursing home bed for her Medicaid pending .

For now , You can try your County Area Agency of Aging . Look on your county website for the number . Ask to speak to a social worker about help placing Mom in SNF
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Reply to waytomisery
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cover9339 Aug 15, 2024
Some hospitals could be wise to this.
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