My 90 year old Mom is ambulatory with a walker and in the past has had pretty good hygiene with bathing from a sink. She has been a resident at the AL for 3 years and has never showered. She has medium dementia and very poor memory.
Lately however, she is getting quite smelly. To me this indicates she is not able to bath sufficiently herself. The aides are willing and have offered to help her shower, but she refuses. They have a nice walking shower at the facility with a chair.
She says she will only take a bath (thinking from years past when getting in and out was not an issue.)
Any suggestions?
The next try was to restrict her from outings she liked like taking walks, or trips to primary doctor who she adores. She was told couldn’t do these things unless she bathed.
Things still not great on bathing front but, not being so demanding about it we are at a shower about twice a month, and hair washing monthly. We try sponge baths in between. The shower situation is truly a balance of choosing your battles.
Another option is to use this time to get recommendation for a higher level of care, like Memory Care. Their staff is trained and they seem to know how to manage resistance. When in regular AL, my LO refused any kind of bath, but, once in MC, she never gave them a problem. They worked with her and soon it was not an issue.