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From 150 lbs she is down to 105.



She lives in a lovely apartment.


Her kitchen is well stocked, she eats a healthy breakfast at home .


She goes out to eat regularly and often orders a chocolate milkshake after a generous, well balanced meal.


Yet she continues to lose weight.


She is generally active, using a walker to shop and do errands with her companion.


The companion is taking on more housecleaning duties but she still does her own laundry and changes her sheets and straightens up her apartment.


She does have arthritis and a colostomy.


Her heart is strong and though she has fallen a few times she has never broken a bone!


She knows what she likes and what she wants and is demanding, usually getting it.

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Get to the doctor ASAP!! My Mom lost a lot of weight at the end of 2021. At the end her Sept. 2021 doctor appointment Mom is getting dressed then she says can you check the lump in my breast? My eyebrows went up and thought why didn't she tell me. I've been her caregiver since 2007. Sure enough she had a good size lump. Totally explained why she recently went from a size 10 to a size petite 4. She has breast cancer. At age 91 and having Alzheimers dementia I said no to surgery. Dementia & anesthesia don't mix well. Mom is in no pain and I keep her busy with weekly trips to the beach to walk because she loves the beach. We take spur of the moment day trips. She just attended her 2nd concert to South Korean boy band BTS in Las Vegas. Her 1st BTS concert being in December 2021 at SOFI Stadium. Mom is living a good life right now and I don't regret not giving her the surgery. I'm just trying to make good memories and give Mom the best life possible.
I hope that everything goes well with your Mom.
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bundleofjoy May 2022
what an amazing, kind person you are :).
bringing your mother to concerts, weekly trips to the beach...! :)
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Your mom should definitely be examined by a doctor regardless of her age. It could be something minor that can be treated (i.e., a vitamin defiency) like my mom had. My mom is 96 years old and I would never take it upon myself to do nothing. It is so easy to say she had a good life and do nothing but it is not the right thing to do. Even if a doctor's prognosis deems it's something serious then you should make the right decision on how to proceed. You will feel better knowing you did the right thing. You and your mom are in my prayers.
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I agree with so many posters who have suggested that you have your mother checked out with her primary care physician, just to see if there is some major reason for the weight loss other than age. This is not some misguided attempt to prolong the life of a 96 year old, but to make sure you have cared for your mother as well as you can, so that her eventual death is not painful if it does not need to be so. Best wishes to you.
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I think it could be helpful to say over what period of time this has occurred.

I've read some responses already. It seems you have helpful ones.

I hope she continues to enjoy life and am happy she has you to watch for her best care.
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She's not going to live forever. Nobody does
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It could be cancer.
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TChamp Apr 2022
Let assume they discover cancer, and then what? Chemotherapy, surgery or both. Do you think a 96 years old patient will come out alive with this treatment? Let's imagine that the cancer treatment is successful. How many more years do think she will live?
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Firehousegal: She should schedule a visit with her primary care physician for starters.
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Check her blood sugar level.
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Hi there , I had a friend whose mother was going thru something similar… anyway I won’t go through the details, the dr’s couldn’t figure it out, my friend started doing research and it ended up being the medications she was on … she had lost so much weight, couldn’t do basic things on her own from weakness… they switched up her meds and she got better! I was baffled the dr’s didn’t catch it ! Anyway good luck ! 💚🙏
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TChamp Apr 2022
Your mother wasn't 96 years old.
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I would get her cancer screened. Don't let this panic you, it is SOP. it can just be a natural process for her. My mother was a heavy smoker and she had sudden weight loss and it was due to cancer. It just doesn't hurt to error in caution.
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TChamp Apr 2022
Are you looking a for a diagnosis for her death certificate?
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150 to 105 without trying to lose weight—something is wrong. She needs a complete medical work up. Could be something fixable like thyroid; possibly gluten intolerance. Or could be something more troubling. Whatever it is, it needs investigating. It is not normal. It is not part of aging.
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My father had ALZ and mom has vascular dementia. Both off them had/ have lost a lot of weight as well. Just part of the aging process. So hard to see loved ones decline regardless of what health issues they have. Hugs! :)
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I'm assuming she gets regular check-ups? Mention it to her doctor and whatever they say, do. At the end of the day, if she's happy and healthy at her age, enjoy every minute and don't worry. Bodies as old as hers are slowly losing muscle, abilities etc... It could be that her body is preparing for its natural destination.
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Mine is the same. She has had chronic iron loss for the last 3 years, but even 3 years ago, decided not to test,rather, just treat the symptoms. Even an endoscopy at age 90 is risky. And for what?
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WendyElaine Apr 2022
My former husband had chronic iron loss and weight loss. It was a long time in getting figured out but he was finally diagnosed as being gluten intolerant. He cut the gluten out of his diet—fixed. Might be worth trying without testing.
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Just a humble opinion…
Apparently she doesn’t have enough good bacteria in her gut to digest and convert the food into nutrients, it seems to be passing through undigested. The bile required for digestion in the upper vowel comes from the liver, which has over 500 functions in the body. Everything that we eat passes through our liver. Cirrhosis or scarring of the liver may be the cause. My wife had it. Also, my wife had a pinched; kinked tube exiting the liver, she dropped 60 lb over a five year period. Died @ 100 lb or less. Get her checked out immediately: (blood workup and scans)?
Carbohydrates (pasta, cookies, bread, grains) are digested in the mouth by saliva biome; proteins are digested by acid in the stomach, so if she’s taking any antacid tablets/ liquid to stop heartburn she should stop doing that immediately. What she should take for heartburn is the exact opposite. Any acid reflux can be stopped in a few seconds by sucking on a sour orange (Citric acid, or a slow sip of Kombucha, which is a fermented tea, very rich in probiotics and the perfect acidic strength to aid digestion, along with the good bacteria that your body needs for a heathy digestive system. 16 oz $3.00.
It’s 100% gut healthy, tiny, tiny amount % alcohol, not an alcoholic beverage, and you only need two mouthfuls over ten minutes to cure hiccups or acid reflux. Try to keep her upright during eating and for a while afterward. The food needs to stay down in the stomach to digest, obviously.
I sincerely hope this helps. Also watch her carefully for Dementia and Alzheimer’s, because the brain is directly affected by the gut, AND vice-versa. They are bi-directionally connected. Also look up Leaky Gut! This is where the bad bacteria (not killed by the good bacteria) take over the gut and some leak through the bowel wall into the blood stream; get carried to the brain, causing inflammation in the brain, and then there’s irreversible synapse damage and the brain starts to shrink.
If you are over 40 you need to study how you can stop this brain deterioration before it’s an issue threatening your life. Take my warning seriously. My wife did just two months ago. She had malfunctioning liver to a degree, but what killed her was a slow, insidious dying of her brain, eating fresh prepared veggies, meats, salmon; losing weight. Little by little, she lost it. All of it.
It’s extremely painful to Everyone involved. It’s a constant heartbreaking ache that never goes away, helpless 24/7. She was on Morphine Sulphate around the clock to help her with her pain. She had RigorMortise, in a fetal position, for a month before she died. Finally we couldn’t pry her mouth open enough to get a syringe between her lips.
Please get help: call your local doctor’s office, get her into free Hospice care at home. Medicare supplies an all electric twin
bed with railings, diapers, latex gloves, pillow, toilet over-ride chair; you have to provide the in home care and feeding, diaper changing, all of her care, basically. Nurses are available for free medications, advice, and supplies. Someone will be scheduled by Hospice to come once or twice a week to bathe her, change the sheet and pillow case.
Preventative care, Palliative Care in home should be on your minds.

An example was given to me: When a match is struck in the forest, you can use it safely and put it out, or you can wait until the forest is on fire, and then try to put it out.
Early on, you can be in control, wait too long and you lose everything.
I went into this day by day, naively, five years ago I could have done something to help my wife, but the doctors who did all of the testing didn’t advise me at all,
My wife and I were married 58 years ago. Losing her this way was preventable! I lost my life’s most valued treasure: my wife, still my sweetheart.
Please take care of yourselves!
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Just my 2 cents: At 96, your mom is quite a rock star for getting around like she does. I believe she's smart enough to make decisions for herself. Let it go.......
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Please read Being Mortal by Atul Gawande. Your 96-year-old mother sounds like she could verbalize what she wants. The hard part is actually listening to our aging parents.
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WendyElaine Apr 2022
That book is great! I should reread it.
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she needs her MD to check her electrolytes...Also there is an emotional component to eating which revolves around "is she a happy person?"
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Having a well stocked kitchen and observing that she is eating well when she is dining out doesn't mean that she is actually eating well at home, and even if she is going through a lot of groceries that isn't proof the food is actually being consumed after it is prepared. I know that people tend to hate on supplements like boost and ensure because they aren't "real food", but they can be a valuable addition to her calorie count in the short term while you figure this out and for the long term if needed.
My words of warning - something very similar happened to my mother (although her weight loss was more subtle and I failed to notice it), it lead to weakness and frailty, which lead to falls and ultimately started the downward spiral of her final years.
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As we age, our bodies change with their abilities to absorb nutrients. The gut lining actually changes, it's our entire bodies that are aging, and working less 'well'. (from my SIL who is a GI doc).

You cannot expect a 96 yo gut to do the work that a 40 yo gut did. Just one more lovely part of aging. I've become lactose intolerant as I have gotten older and much more sensitive to overeating--I have to really watch the dairy.

My mom has maintained a weight of about 140 lbs for years, eating whatever she wants, but pretty much just 2 meals a day. She is almost immobile, so she isn't burning many calories at all.

My MIL has GAINED a lot of weight in the last few years and told me she was over 180lbs after always weighing about 130 all her adult life. I think she eats a lot and is also pretty immobile, but IDK, I'm not in her life.

I think at 96, you should just let her have what she wants. Short of a physical problem, which should be ruled out by her Dr., just let her be.
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Get her to a doctor ASAP. Don't minimize this weight loss. Unexplained weight loss is one of the classic symptoms of cancer, diabetes and other serious diseases.

Take care.Liz
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TChamp Apr 2022
Can she be cured from a serious disease? are you sure? So far outside the failure to gain weight is the only problem. What's wrong with just leaving her alone?
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She has lost almost ONE THIRD of her body weight and you're consulting a social internet forum?

What does her doctor suggest might be causing this dramatic weight loss?

[You're using the same, accurate scales? and she wasn't holding on to anything for balance the last time she was weighed, was she? - it might be worth checking again]
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I would have her get a full blood wk up , test her gut and a bowel test. I would make sure she’s drinking lots of water and eating a plant base diet . Check out dr, Dr. Michael Klaper website and plant base tele. Also, check out Dr. Neal Barnard. Great job taking care of Mom.
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:) hi OP! is your mother having diarrhea? that's 1 way to lose weight quickly. the body isn't absorbing the food. definitely get a doctor (home visit?) to check out what might be going on.

your mother (96) sounds like she has amazing health (apart from the worrying weight loss). going out! errands! manages to do her own laundry. incredible. hug!!
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Have Dr check her out. My husband suffered from an inflammatory disease at age 62. No amount of food helped. His body was not absorbing any nutrients or enzymes that Dr prescribed.
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TChamp Apr 2022
Your husband was young, not 96. Life expectancy has to be taken into consideration before making treatment decisions.
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She should be checked for Diabetes.
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At 84. I lost 44 lbs. from lack of appetite due to hip replacement re-do complications. It’s over, and I’ve gained about 15 back, which is about right! Appetite back too! Sometimes it does mean an underlying serious illness and,if I were 96, I’d say to hell with it! Even at 84, there are probably things I would not endure ( like a THIRD surgery right after two, when the hip dislocated 11 times!! I wore a brace for awhile & it has now stabilized!). Congrats to doing so well at 96; I hope your Mom continues to enjoy these years!
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TChamp Apr 2022
I agree with you.
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Kudos to your mother who is so active at age 96! It sounds like she is not in pain. Speak to her doctor about her weight loss, but she may decide that it's best to do nothing. Do you know her wishes about medical care (advance directives, a living will)? It may be more bothersome for her to have to go through extensive tests and possibly invasive medical procedures, rather than just to continue enjoying her life. It might be time to switch to hospice-type care (comfort care) if that is her wish, rather than aggressive medical care to fix things. Her doctor would have to certify that she is ready for hospice care.
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Some people in the forum resist to accept reality. A 96 year old person has surpassed the average life expectancy and is at a ripe for dying naturally at any time. She seems to be enjoying her moment. To submit this woman to rigorous medical tests and treatments is cruel and for what? Why not accept the laws of nature? There is nothing wrong for a 96 year old person who has started to go down hill. Let's suppose they find a malignancy, will they cure her? or will they kill her sooner with chemotherapy?
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Candyapple Apr 2022
Great ! Response. I concur but I also would say just drink lots of water and eat plant based foods as well as just getting tested for blood levels and checking the gut. Otherwise Mum sounds good. I think it’s wonderful she is the age God has given her thus far. Great Response.
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I feel your pain, since I have the same problem.

My mother, who is about to turn 90 in two weeks suffered a huge weight loss from the time she got sick last year to the present time. I live with mom, so I saw this first hand. Last year after turning 89. she got very sick, with a number of ailments. First, she had a bad reaction to a new drug, then she got a UTI, followed by diverticulitis, and some other stuff. She dropped from 120 lbs to 87 lbs. For a while she was in hospice, but thankfully, she was removed from hospice after it was apparent she was not dying. Now she wants to gain weight but says she has no appetite. She has upper and lower dentures. She tells me she trouble swallowing "solid" food, meat potatoes, salad, etc. She lives almost exclusively on soup, preferably creamy vegetable or seafood soups. I put all the soups through a blender to eliminate large pieces and get a smooth texture. She always eats her soup. Mental state is good with little cognitive loss. She walks with a walker fairly well, though she does get tired.

My goals for her are to try to get some more weight on her. She wants to gain weights but has little appetite. So far, I have started adding grated cheese to her soups to increase the caloric count. Also, she is eating Greek Yogurt in the mornings. Someone on this post mentioned thyroid problems, so I'm thinking of setting up a Drs visit to check her thyroids. She has started eating some solid food. Yesterday she ate some sheppards pie, with no problems. At the moment, she is eating enough to maintain her weight, but she needs to eat more. I would like to get her to 100 lbs or so. Any suggestions are welcome
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Candyapple Apr 2022
Check out dr. Michael Klaper and dr. Neal Barnard have her drink lots of water. Also have blood test that tells the story see a gastro to check her gut. Most of all listen to intouch.org my lovely pastor Dr. Charles Stanley
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