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We discussed that each other are the only ones who get medical information from the doctor/hospital. How do we make this legal.Our divorce was due to his daughter lying to him about an argument between me and his daughter. I move back in with him 4 months after our divorce and have been taking care of him since. His condition has gotten worse and he is currently on a ventilator. I know what he want and don't want to happen, his children don't. Who has the right, me or his children ? What do I need to do to honor my ex's wishes ?We were married 13 yrs and we have been back together since 2012 to now 2024, that's a total of 25 yrs.The nurse at the hospital told me that his daughter was his next of kin over me and giving her his medical information. This is against his wishes.What do I need to do ?

If your husband is of sound mind, he can put you on his Hipaa form as someone who can receive his info. He can also request his daughter not get any information. Does not matter if she is next of kin if he can tell the staff his wishes. If he can't and you put nothing in place, then daughter is in charge.

In hindsight, he should have had financial POA and Medical POA written up assigning you. His medical would have listed what he did and didn't want.
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Reply to JoAnn29
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Turbogirl6280, welcome to the forum. Any time I or my significant other were in the hospital, we always wrote down each other's names regarding who gets medical information. Same with doctor's offices, etc. Not once did he write down his grown children. We had zero problems.


Curious, are you medical Power of Attorney for your ex-husband, now significant other? If yes, that would correct any issues regarding medical information.
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Reply to freqflyer
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His daughter IS his next of kin. Not you.
The hospital is correct, tho they should not be giving ANYONE any information without his specific permission if he is competent.
If he isn't competent then you are too late. The daughter will be getting the information and having the rights and you will have none. She may have POA papers. Does you hubby know?

You both need to see an elder law attorney and make it so with documents.
Wishing you good luck.
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Reply to AlvaDeer
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unless he is competent “on a ventilator” to sign paperwork, you can’t change it. You are divorced and not his next of kin legally. I’m sorry you didn’t set this up in advance for him with paperwork.
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Reply to Guestshopadmin
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“Who has that right, me or his children?”

Did he complete a form naming you his health care power of attorney/health care proxy? Might have even been on admission to the hospital. If so, then whoever is named does indeed have primary decision-making rights and access to medical information.

if not, then I could imagine an adult child would have priority over an ex-wife, but it would depend a little bit on state law.
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Reply to Rumbletown
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Is there a reason that after 12 years you don’t just remarry?
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Reply to PeggySue2020
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