My mom is 88 and is a nursing home to get therapy after a fall and a broken bone in her hip area, femur. She had surgery, She doesn't like it there but theres no way to handle at home yet. She was doing fine, but we've noticed in the last week, that her short term memory is getting shorter and shorter, to the extent she forgets in minutes. No UIT its been checked. I visited yesterday and then again today, and could see the decline even in that time period. Does this signal that she hasn't got much time left? We are four girls caring for her, taking turns being with her at every meal and at bedtime. She's in a awesome care center, one of the best in Michigan
Also, the pain meds and such--all these affect us differently as we age.
I would ask for a Hospice consult ASAP. They can help you so much in determing what to expect and what to do.
My MIL was placed in Hospice Care and told she had 2-3 weeks left. 9 months later and she's still here. It has not been pleasant for anyone, just warning you.
You'll find your 'stride' in this. I just hope your mom has peace in her life.
How is she physically? Is she eating and keeping on weight? Is she getting enough oxygen? The body can continue on long after the mind is gone.
What do the doctors say?
I am glad they checked for a UTI. She may get better; she may not. She is 88, so almost anything can be "the beginning of the end". For my own Mom it was a fall, hospitalization, urinary tract infection, increasing instability in gait, another fall, pneumonia, and just a downward trajectory that worsened over the course of a few months, slowly and steadily until the signs of heart failure and other systems weakening were clear. She almost beat hospice; was on it less than a week when she died.
Each patient, each person, is as individual as his or her own thumbprint. You honestly cannot predict, nor can you know if she would be better or worse at home. If she doesn't improve and cannot cooperate with PT and OT it is worth a try for homegoing. If that cannot help she may be heading toward hospice in the absence of anything to explain this. I am so sorry. I sure wish you, and your Mom as well, the best of luck.
Even though you have 4 people caring for mom it seems kind of ridiculous for someone to always be there for every single meal and at bedtime. One or more of you or all of you will burnout doing this for months and months at a time.
It's nice to do a lot but a lot of pressure on you as well. If she won't eat, etc maybe you could hire an aide (with mom's money) to help her out and give you a bit of a break.
It raises the question of what really makes a person – the body or the mind?
Why the overkill on the visiting her daily, being with her at every meal? You said that she is in a good facility, it sounds like you are taking her back home...why not research some MC homes? She will not mentally get better, her brain is broken.
You ladies will burn out if you take her home, it will happen.
My 95 y/o mother who has CHF and a pacemaker is now in the hospital with Covid and a UTI. She is on antivirals and antibiotics and is telling my sister she wants to go home. I am just amazed that her body just keep going.
Of course it remains to be seen if she will get back what she had before this hospitalization. I’m dreading what the new normal is going to be.
What happens when your mom is released from rehab? Where will she go and who will assist with care if needed? I would start planning now.
Edit: I just read that your mom lives with your sister. If your mom was somewhat independent before, she may not be when she gets home. This could be a lot for your sister. A change in care may be needed. I am just saying this based on my own experience with my mother falling, breaking her hip, surgery and then recovery at almost the same age as your mother.