Mom is 88 yrs. old, still lives in her own home but doesn’t cook anymore. She only eats breakfast and lunch, no supper because she claims she just isn’t hungry. She has probably lost at least 50 pounds in the last 18 mo. and is getting weaker. Breakfast is always a bowl of Cheerios and lunch varies. Sometimes she will eat what my sister & I bring her but there are days she just has an apple or popcorn. Looking for solutions to ensure she has a more balanced diet.
If she is on medicare, have her doctor order home health with some physical and occupational therapy. Tell him you don't want them to run at the same time, but to alternate one with the other. It keeps the therapies/exercise going for a longer period of time. If they schedule at the same time, you only get a couple of months and then get cut off for a while.
Maybe if she was exercising more, she would be a little more hungry. You should also plant the seed that if she keeps losing weight and getting weaker, living alone could soon come to an end. Might encourage her to do a little better on the eating. If you can set up the meals on wheels, great. Otherwise, maybe you and sis can prep some things to put in the frig and freezer: meals and some snack type trays with fruit, cheese, crackers, etc.
More recently I ordered a meal delivery service. The company is called Moms Meals. (Kaiser patients get discount, I think it was about $8 a meal). I don’t live close but my brother does, so he would go over and take in the box and put the meals away). Then when he would go over in the evening to fix her something to eat he just had to grab one and warm it for her. He said it was very convenient. Mom would always say “I don’t want that” but when he warmed it she ate it.
They have several options to cover many dietary requirements. Good luck.
My parents live in a different city than I do so I had to do some Googling to find the MOW in my dad's area when I was looking for him. It wasn't as simple as just looking up "Meals on Wheels." Apparently, it's different in every city. In his area, I recall it being run by a ministry. And it took a while to get approved. I want to say over a month or two. Anyway, he seems to really like it.
My mom seems to like being a driver for it. She has her requested route and her favorite clients. In addition to the extra nutrition, they are also getting checked on everyday. My mom, a cat person herself, was telling me about her "cat lady" client, who is supposed to be having gall bladder surgery soon. So in other words, she visits with them as well.
I think it would be wonderful if you could arrange MOW for your mom. Just start Googling and even if you live in a different city, it shouldn't be an issue to get it set up for your mom.
By any chance, could your Mom just be forgetting to eat? 50 pounds in 18 months is a considerable weight loss.
Good luck!
They do offer full breakfast meals too. Delivery is scheduled.
Shipt and Instacart deliver from local grocery stores and are a lesser price. You can order online and check the nutrition labels yourself. We have had good luck with Smart Ones, Lean Cuisine & Heart Healthy brands.The portions are smaller and perfect for elderly.
Losing 50 lbs over 18 months can be good or bad but it all depends how/why she lost it and whether she had 50 pounds to lose?? Is mom under weight? How does she feel? Her choice of snacks makes me think that she feels pretty good? Maybe that’s because I occasionally like popcorn for dinner. 🤫
You mentioned in your bio that you lost your sister a year ago, could that be tied to mom’s weight loss? Has she been grieving perhaps?
Is your mom active? Keep her own home tidy or is she sitting most of the time? Not many calories are required for sitting.
Has she been to the doctor in the last year to make sure her blood work is good? Did she start any new medication in that time frame?
I ordered MOW for my DH aunt for years. They were very faithful to call me if she didn’t come to the door when they came by. So they are a good “extra” set of eyes to look out for your mom as well as for food.
I boiled aunt eggs, made her little containers of cottage cheese and peaches, sometimes deviled the eggs, made up peanut butter finger sandwiches or cheese sticks with fruit, basically provided healthy snacks that she would eat that contained protein. She would never eat past 4 p.m. and didn’t eat breakfast at all when I started helping her. An apple or popcorn are both good snacks. Good fiber. Aunt wouldn’t eat either of those. Her go to before was a couple of slices of bread (or a loaf if she was hungry). she was constantly constipated. We finally had to keep the bread out of sight to encourage her toward healthier snacks.
Also protein drinks are a good supplement.
Hydration and protein were the things I tried to keep an eye on with aunt. With your mom, if she is too thin, I would be wanting to add calories. It all depends on what is going on with her. It is best not to guess.
Depending on your moms insurance, she might qualify for home health services through Medicare. This is a weekly nurse check of her vitals and other services as needed. This is under the homebound segment of Medicare.
My mom and aunt had it for years. Your mom might qualify.
If she has seen her doctor lately, give the dr a call and ask that they order home health for her; that you are concerned about the weight loss. If she hasn’t seen the doctor maybe it is time for a check up? One of the really good things about home health is that the weekly nurse visit keeps an experienced eye on things that can head off hospital or ER visits. It really worked well for my LOs.
I didn’t try to change their preference for living at home but I did encourage layers of help to make it work for as long as possible.
There is something reassuring about looking at a log of weekly vitals and weight that lets you know that all the basics are in range. It helped me during those times when aunt didn’t appear to be eating. I could look at the nurses log and see that her weight did fluctuate 5-7 lbs off and on but overall remained steady.
50 lbs is a lot if it is continuing to trend down and mom is too thin and doesn’t feel well. I don’t think MOW alone is the answer but will be helpful if her health is otherwise stable.
http://www.thecouncilonaging.org/
It would be nice if she came back to clarify.
Google it for your area or if you contact your local Senior Center they may be aware of what other services are in the area. (I know my area I see the Salvation Army food trucks delivering Meals on Wheels to residents)
Would mom consider Independent or Assisted Living? She would get the activity of more people, a friendly community, and meals that she could take in her apartment or in a dining room. And if she needed help it would be there.
(Congrats on your Anniversary!🎉)