Any B of A people out there? She had been having me assist her at the end of the month, to pay the bills for rent, and telephone, and such. But now when I ask her to prepare for this she gives me glib talk about her laundry and "other people" and other such nonsense... I don't think she realizes any more that the bills need to be paid. She will not produce the checkbook (I write out the checks; I've done it this way, with her permission, for years, because her hand is shaky). I would like to have help from the bank; they mentioned "joint owner." But their website only mentions that term in connection with teenagers, not people in their late 80s.
To get everything started, I took Dad to his bank and asked the Bank Manager what to do so that I could write out the checks plus sign them. The Manager helped us set up the account to make that possible. It was quite easy, the Bank Manager was so very helpful :)
Next step, I had all the bills redirected to my address, thus no fear of recycling an unpaid bill, like before :P
Then I bought some 3-ring binders so I could file the bills along with copies of the checks, just in case I needed such paperwork in the future.
When I had taken my parents to see an Elder Law Attorney, the Attorney had to make sure that my parents understood what they were signing. Even though my Mom was in her late 90's, the Attorney let my Mom be "primary" with me being "secondary" for my Dad's POA. Similar with my Mom's POA. This worked out quite well. While there, my parents updated their very outdated Wills, made out Medical Directives which they never had before, and even a Trust.
In addition, if you think at some point you might need to apply for Medicaid, you don't want there to be any questions raised about whose funds are whose.
I think you want to talk to her bank manager about the best way to title the account, if she agrees.
I think what you want to set up is called a Convenience Account.
1) Go to secure.bankofamerica.com/login/enroll/entry/olbEnroll.go?request_locale=en_US
Copy and paste the link above. You will see two boxes asking for information.
2) Put in her account number or her ATM card number
3) Put in her social security number
Then click Continue
4) Follow the instructions to create an online ID and password
5) Follow the instructions to choose and answer secret questions.
6) You will also be asked to put in your cell phone number so that you can be sent a code when you access the account from a new computer.
Once you finish the process, you now can access the account by going to
https://www.bankofamerica.com/
From there, you can put in the ID, and password that you just create, and will have access to the account. You then can set up bill payments. You will need to know the payee names, addresses, and account numbers (utilities, credit card, etc.)
It is not difficult, just takes a little time. Once it's all set up, it's a breeze to use.
If possible, I highly recommend you open a B of A account for yourself at a branch, then have the bank rep walk you through all the steps to have online access and setting up bill payment and you can ask questions in person. Once you know how to do it, you can do the same for your mother's account.
Then when she passes, you can still use the account. If you're merely proxy under a DPOA, that authority ceases when she dies. And believe me, you'll need that authority to sign sooner than you think as any authority under a POA ceases on death.
So think long time - what assets can you immediately access after she passes (I'm not trying to be maudlin, just realistic)? Assuming other assets have to be retitled, you need immediate access for potential last illness costs as well as funeral and/or burial costs, and as well for payment of the bills.
I'm still working on retitling asses but had a palliative care and cemetery plot costs to pay and couldn't have done it w/o access to the joint account.
I type up a sheet of paper with our checking accounts balances (we have one for each farm) and the monthly budget of what has been paid and what needs to be paid. 99% of our utilities are BILL PAY. Our farm-related expenses cannot be BILLPAY so they have to be manual checks. After we review the pieces of paper with the account balances and the budget, Mom says, “Okay.” and doesn’t ask for more information. I make sure she has $10 of one dollar bills in her purse and that she has money in her “Trust Fund” at the nursing home.
All of our accounts are currently joint accounts. I have lived with Mom in her house (since Dad died) and not worked for 10 years because (1) Mom didn't want me to work except part-time, (2) I couldn't find a part-time job in my specialty in this rural location, and (3) my health doesn't allow me to commute 60-90 minutes to a job. I will need to make some changes now that she is in a nursing home. (No hurry as she is 87 years old and will be private pay until she is age 95+.) We have 3-ring notebooks for each checking account (and each farm) which makes it easy to look up for tax time. I also do online banking with all of the accounts and I make sure that I hit “Print Screen” button during each transaction, copy the screen image to a WORD Document, print the screen image and put it in the 3-ring binders also.
Dougiemonty1, since your Mom isn’t showing much interest in her checking accounts, just show her what she is interested in and leave it at that. Have all of the bank statements mailed to you and make sure that you are on your Mom’s accounts as DPOA so that you can sign checks for her without being accused of stealing her money. Keep blank checks at your house. Do NOT put any of your own money into your Mom’s accounts due to Medicaid requirements. Sign her checks as: “Your name DPOA for Your Mom’s name”. Talk to her bank to see what requirements they have for you to sign checks as DPOA and to meet Medicaid requirements.