my mom lived with me for eight years and with my sister for the last two years. My mom has brain seizures, and as a result of that, she has short term dementia. When my mom went to live with my sister, she was in bad shape. Her seizure medication was not working properly. And she was having problems, walking, and talking and remembering. Due to unforeseen circumstances, I no longer could care for her and my sister said that she would take her. During the first couple weeks of my sister having her she got her to sign a POA. At that time, my mom was in no state of mind to sign anything. During the time she was with my sister, she would sometimes be OK and other times, she would tell me that she’s scared, and that my sister and her family were mean to her and that my sister would tell her that she had no money. One weekend I wanted to take her shopping and I called my sister to ask her Mac card number cause she wanted to take money out and my sister said that my mom no longer has access to her money because she has dementia and hung the phone up on me. Since my mom has been in the nursing home, she is like a different person. She is independent I need no help with anything. She can remember everything from years ago, but not things that happen recently. She has no recollection of signing a POA and does not want my sister to have that authority over her. My sister is not been to see her or call her since she put her in there. My mom says that she believes that my sister is spending her money and she has medical needs that she take care of now because my sister said she has no money. My mom wants to change her POA but we have no kind of ID for my mom to take her and change the POA . I believe my sister was neglecting to give my mom her seizure medicine when she was in her care and then taking her to the doctors so she could get them to say that she had severe dementia so she could get her out of her house. My mom would tell me all the time that she did not want to be there and they made her feel unwanted, and my sister would tell her that she did not want her at her house. So now I probably have to get around that before we can change the POA. My sister is a notary. So we believe she notarized the POA herself. She has never shown us any documents. At this point, my sister won’t even take our calls. I really don’t know what to do. I just want my mom to have access to her money so she can take care of her medical needs.
Therefore, why not get feedback from someone with trained medical knowledge? Mom's Doctor, the NH Doctor or NH Nurse in Charge. What IS Mom's current diagnosis? Mild cognitive impairement? Short-term memory impairement? Or is the term Dementia correct?
You report Mom had trouble with walking, talking, sezures & short-term memory. You also report Mom is "independant" - do you mean regarding specific tasks eg showering & dressing?
I am not sure how that is relevant? Are you implying that because Mom WANTS to leave she should? (Despite her health care needs?)
Correct me if wrong, but it reads that you are viewing Mom as a 'victim' in all this. You are attempting to make things better for Mom somehow but sister is 'the bad guy'.
I am not sure what is it you want to achieve?
Or you can take mom out to get one.
(If you are able to do so, don't know if your sister has placed restrictions)
Your other option would be to talk to an Elder Care Attorney and seek Guardianship. I doubt seriously if the attorney would find your mom cognizant enough to change POA.
The Guardianship would trump the POA.
Call DMV and see if they will come to Mom. See if there is a lawyer who will come to the NH. If Mom understands what a POA means, she should be able to assign someone else. The new POA will say all others are revoked. It would be nice to have a letter sent to Sis telling her POA has been revoked and that she needs to hand over all records to the new POA.