I was with my mother when she died many years ago. I recently was learning more about death and dying and realized that the memory of her death was blocked out or gone. She was not expected to die, I had just popped by her residential care home for a quick visit on a sunny tuesday afternoon, sitting with her chatting to her, she was unresponsive, then I don't remember much after that,
I have so many of my former classmates from elementary, middle school and high school approach me. "Remember me?" No, I don't remember them at all. I had 2 people bully me in middle school. I have absolutely NO memories of it. But my younger sister hates them - even up to now. She was the one who had to keep coming to my defense when bullied.
About 6 years ago, my gynecologist mentioned "cancer" to me. I went into shock, blacked out on the exam table. When I "came to", I was sitting up, the nurse was gone, and the doctor was holding my hands patting it, talking but no sounds. I conveniently "forgot" that I was going to Hawaii for surgery and to do the biopsy to see if I had ovarian cancer. I only remembered when my SIL asked me if I knew what kind of hospital I was being operated in. A women/children cancer hospital. I completely forgot.
Like caregiver14, when life is just too much for you to handle, your subconscious takes over. It hides the hurt/pain that your conscious mind cannot deal with. What scares me so much is that this Not remembering can be very dangerous for me. What if I didn't learn from the first time? And I repeat it -not knowing - that I parked there before, and got raped. Not remembering, I might still go and park there. That is my greatest fear about this 'not remembering' painful events in your life.
Scary, isn't it? To have absolutely not remember the event. I'm so sorry. {{HUGS}}
It's the body's way of protecting itself from pain.