Are you sure you want to exit? Your progress will be lost.
Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
✔
I acknowledge and authorize
✔
I consent to the collection of my consumer health data.*
✔
I consent to the sharing of my consumer health data with qualified home care agencies.*
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
Even if they have Parkinson's? Feeling guilty. My Mom gives me a hard time she doesn't want to have showers may I say more it turns into a battle. We were bickering yesterday than we both said sorry and started crying but I still feel really bad.
Geez...how familiar this sounds. It is a constant battle over everything in my house. Baths, hair washing, medicine, eating, you name it we battle over it and I wind up angry and frustrated beyond all reason. If I say it's time for a sponge bath (because she will not get in the tub) she "feels sick". If I'm making dinner she's hungry NOW, feed me! If I ask if she's hungry the answer is no and then 15 minutes to a half hour later she accuses me of starving her. She can't use a walker because it's "too hard" but then falls down. She says her meds make her sick but then wants more to ease the sickness. Questions what time do I get my next meds...every 15 minutes. Says she can't remember but when I tell her something happened she says no it didn't because she doesn't remember it. I tried interviewing companies to come in during the day when I'm at work and she throws them out. But then says she's lonely and wants someone to sit with her during the day. It just goes on and on and on. Always accusing me being mean to her and trying to "get rid" of her. And then turns around and says she doesn't know what she would do without me. I have had to leave the house and go for a drive just to maintain my cool. But sometimes I do flare up at her and then feel guilty for it. I have seriously considered putting her in a nursing home just because she will not comply with anything I ask of her. I always feel like she is "playing" me.
Hey my Mom just accused me of taking her pocketbook and putting clothes in the draw that belong to someone else. She's pissed at me.. So I found pocketbook told her clothes belong to her and walked away before I said something I will regret!!
I have the same problem I'm always arguing with my dad about something or another. I get so angry at him and don't know how to deal with it. I have taking care of my 76 year old dad for almost 7 years and it's getting real bad he's getting mean accuses my 4 year old grandson that he stole money his cell phone etc and has told my single daughter if 2 that she is not a good mother with that I flew off the handle had to walk away I was so mad and people just tell me he don't know what he's doing or saying I call BS on that because after my daughter left he started in on me about my daughter and that was an hour or so later.
I guess walking away and gathering your thoughts is best ,but some times the arguments are unavoidable.Crying is normal .So is apologizing.Until next time.. This will re-occur, so just hang in there and do what you can to get her to do her cares.I had patients who always said no when asked to take a shower or a bath no matter what the circumstances..a battle of wills occurred over and over.Sometimes I won sometimes not so much..I learned to just go with the flow and "test the water" before even asking..good luck and hang in there
My sister has issues with my Dad along these lines, she is with him the majority of the time (I am with him when I can as my husband is 100% disabled as well). I don't seem to have the same issues with my Dad, yeah sure he gets angry and irritated..but I just cannot let it interfere with the fact that he doesn't have that much time left on this planet, every day I get to spend with him is precious. I will take whatever time I get and make it all ok.
Well since I have been getting into arguments with my mother since I was seven, for me it would be normal. And if she ever said that she was sorry about something, I might have a heart attack from pure shock. Happens all the time in the nursing homes and believe me, the staff doesn't have time to waste, so they just shove them into the shower whether they want it or not (which is what I remind my mother when she talks about how great living in a nursing home would be!)
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
You need to give up the guilt trip and KNOW you are caring for your Mom the best you can..
Be grateful you got "I'm sorry" from Mom, most of here never get one..
Hugs to you!! Keep loving and respecting her she needs your support..
We're all in the same boat...LOL
This will re-occur, so just hang in there and do what you can to get her to do her cares.I had patients who always said no when asked to take a shower or a bath no matter what the circumstances..a battle of wills occurred over and over.Sometimes I won sometimes not so much..I learned to just go with the flow and "test the water" before even asking..good luck and hang in there
Happens all the time in the nursing homes and believe me, the staff doesn't have time to waste, so they just shove them into the shower whether they want it or not (which is what I remind my mother when she talks about how great living in a nursing home would be!)
See All Answers