How do you not feel bad for getting rid of a hoarders stuff?

Shoe collections can go to Goodwill, and here in Arkansas the libaray system has a big used book sale at least once a year. And I thank God for all the donation and recycling places because I have a hard time throwing things away unless they truly have no use left, and wuld probably BE a hoarder if they weren't around!!

I do agree that hoarding is mental illness, but I am not optimistic that they can be "helped." Does anyone have any examples of former hoarders, who no longer have the urge, or who resist the urge, to hoard? I can't think of anyone who hoards who doesn't just get worse with age.
My mother isn't a horrible hoarder, but we've managed to cut off much of her ability to purchase things. Thank goodness, she is no longer online, because she was an Amazon junkie for a while there, buying nothing but books.
As far as her house, it's not a fire or safety hazard. She just has about 60 years worth of stuff, both hers and my father's (he died in 2009), and aside from a few of his items of clothes, hasn't gotten rid of a thing.
When I can't sleep at night, I go through my list of What to Get Rid of First: her books (tons of them), clothes, furniture, dishes and cookware, linens, other furnishings and knick-knacks, computers, sewing machine, lawn and garden tools...
Frustrated, my mother would do that too - push her stuff onto me. For a long time, I'd take it, feeling guilty that I didn't really want it. Then I'd take it, but immediately donate it (it would go right from the trunk of my car to Goodwill). I'm annoyed that she refused to handle any of this when she still had the ability to. It's going to be quite a task when the time comes. There are moments where I fantasize about the whole thing going up in flames, and only having to make one call to the insurance company.

I know 2 people that are hoarders. They have no life, as their stuff rules them. One presently hired help to get rid of all the 'crap' she has in her house, so she can sell it. In her case, I'm sure who ever buys her house will tear it down. The other person (male) said he wants to "die in his house". He has major mental issues from childhood (his son told him he "doesn't want anything and that he'd light a match to the place"... metaphor). The sooner these people can get help the better (to say the least) not only for them, but for all those around them... including neighbors.

Miss,
Loved to hear how this turned out; it would be insightful to all of us. I sit in my mom's house and she is not a hoarder; but there is a lot of stuff. I can't wait to get started. I do have a plan but can't do anything until she is out of the house and won't be going back. I observe her favorite chair, rug, lamp, table, etc. and will move those things to her new "home" if we ever get that chance. Maybe have her favorite dish, cup, saucer and spoon, knife, fork --- so she'll have something to familiar. I will hang her favorite pictures in her new room or prop up on the dresser so at least homey....Then I'll get started. All her clothes will go the veterans to sort through or toss. Shoe collections = trash. Furniture; rugs, dishes, leaving in the house, have a yard sale and let people just go through and make an offer and haul it off. Nothing we want (maybe one coffee table). Linens, etc. = old and will trash. Jewelry - sell to jeweler. Dishes, silverware, anything else = habitat store.

We will go through all closets, clothes, etc. carefully because we suspect there is money, documents, etc. hidden or stashed. That will be most time consuming. But there is nothing of value in the house that I or sibs want or care about.

Again, shes not a hoarder -- but crafts, and crap in your case; if its in containers, etc. - consider donating to the senior center, etc for them to use.

Your question phrased "how do I not feel bad..." makes this hard to answer because inevitably, a hoarder is by nature manipulative and you are used to each other and WILL most likely feel bad. There is an old saying about how you cannot control how you feel; your feelings are your feelings. You can only control what you do. If you had a little kid who threw a tantrum if you didn't let him play in the street, would you let him? No. It's dangerous and not good for him to allow him to do that. Hoarders have a mental issue. We have a few in our families, my husband and me, both sides. His ex wife, who is now 63, is a hoarder and it caused, in part, their divorce, her job loss, her home being condemned and the loss of all her 'valuable stuff' that ended up mostly in a sludgy mess in her basement, moldy garbage useless to everyone. (I am not simplifying that their divorce, which was almost 30 years ago, was only due to hoarding but this woman has mental issues an the hoarding is only one part). My mother is a hoarder too, but my parents are fairly wealthy so my OCD clean not father organizes her endless purchases and bulging closets as a full time job. They are 80 and 83, she shops every single day, and will never move out of their 5500 SF house on acreage. What a mess for the entire family. My siblings all enable them both. I live in another city and just have to stay away. Here's an example - my mother, several years ago, gave my sister a bunch of 'crap' that she couldn't throw away. This is something hoarders will sometimes do - can't part with it so they push it on a close family member who then feels obligated to not get rid of it. My sister, by the way, is also a keeper and her husband definitely a more fledgling hoarder (their basement is stacked up so high you have to walk over stuff they never use and never will). When they were transferred and couldn't bring all this stuff with them in the move, they had a garage sale. Not surprisingly, they didn't sell much, because although for my sister 'she made the effort' stuff was so highly priced it didn't sell. Thus validating her reason to keep it! However, my mother came to the sale and BOUGHT BACK some of the stuff she'd given my sister in the first place because she was afraid it would be sold! I stay away. The way I see this, unless a hoarder wants help it does not good. Part of the problem with these people is that there seem to never be consequences. In an effort to 'help' them well meaning people clean up for them, bail them out, over and over, frustrating themselves in the process, only to find that in no time it piles up again. If it were up to me, and only me, I would have them evaluated and if they are deemed not a danger to themselves, let them alone. If they are made to leave their homes, then we'd have to figure it out. If they are considered dangerous to themselves, then I would get them to a safe environment and have professionals come and clean out the home and get rid of it. But to keep going back for more is about as crazy as being a hoarder, in my opinion.

I know what you are all talking about. my father saved everything also, he also cut out cartoons and put them in binders, I guess thinking the grandchildren would like them or me.......not. Now that he is in NH, both my brother/I have been cleaning out the true junk and broken stuff. getting things ready for yard sale cause mom don't want it. then there is stuff we do want to keep that we will put in a box. my husband even was helping to go thru junk (jars, tin, metal, nuts/bolts that were broken). They were from a depression era and kept everything. But I must say that my dad could fix anything with something he kept. But I find myself now (when up to it), throwing stuff away that is not needed.

Dear missmel - I really, really do feel for you, and anyone who is having to deal with a parent's hoarded house. It took 2-1/2 years, from Jan 2008 - June 2010, of cleaning out every Saturday and Sunday for 5 hours each day, my parents' hoarded belongings. besides their house, there were 4 giant utility houses in the back yard, 2 cars crammed full, a giant storage unit downtown, and stuff piled up in the back yard. they were both obsessed with hoarding and had been since 1968. I broke down and cried every single visit. my husband and i did this without compensation as mom had spent down so much of her money. My dad had died in 1999 but my mom is still alive in an AL. she still hoards, will take things out of the other ladies' trash cans. i am being serious. when she starts hoarding too much, i know she is feeling anxiety and i get her dr to increase her anti-anxiety meds a little bit. there was no one to clean up her gigantic mess but my husband and me. no cousins. my brother didn't help at all. what my husband and i did was make 3 piles - keep, flea market, and pitch. really, we pitched most of it. anything that seemed worth less than $5 was the rule for pitching. we have sold a lot at the flea, i have given away alot of nice things to friends and family...esp to friends who can't afford nice things. to mom, a subway wrapper holds the same worth as a silver ring. and i really do not believe hoarders can be cured. at least my mom would never be. she has always lived in her own selfish la-la land. i have taken pictures every step of the way to have a visual record of the progress. i wish it could all be wiped out of my mind and my husband, son and i could have our 7 years back. if mom had loved me and cared for me i wouldn't feel so resentful. but....she didn't.....! we do the best we can. i am a good mom to my son (and to my mom) - so at least i broke the generational chain. God bless you and anyone else who has to clean up after a train-wreck hoarder who had always made the cleaner's life h*ll. i would not wish it on the worst person on earth.

Well I have enjoyed reading through all these stories because I am what my late MIL described as a "pack rat" But I am also a crafter with many interests and have spent a good part of the last ten+ years renovating and reselling old houses so have a large collection of useful pieces of wood etc. It is true that everytime I get rid of some thing I do need it again. When I am gone there will indeed be a huge clean out and I am sure a dumpster will arrive the day after the funeral. right now I am going through everything and organizing it into containers., and clearly labeling. for example I have a lot of extra bedding which i am keeping in case my entire family descents. Now I don't actually "need" it but unless we move to smaller accomodation I will continue to keep it, however it will be easy for someone else to dispose of. I do get rid of old clothes too. I have recently dropped from a size 16/18 down to a 12 and have donated all the extra large clothing and shoes I know I will never squeeze my bunions into. I did keep any really good quality items that I may grow into again but the rest went to the thrift store. At this time in my mid 70s I am getting things in order so that my kids won't have too hard a job. hubby's stuff is a different matter because he fills ever unused horizontal space including the floor with papers and I am not permitted to move or organize anything. i have taken over the mail which he now hands directly to me and anything addressed to him casually asks who it was from. if it is something he really needs to see i photocopy it first and keep the original. Junk goes straight into the recycle bin. Getting him to part with old computer stuff, TVs etc is beyond difficult. my space is constantly invaded which is the aspect of this most difficult to deal with.

Cousins. Call them in , let them take some memorabilia if they help fill the dumpster. We needed a 14 cu. yd dumpster, filled it twice. And you have to carefully go through every layer of clothing, pockets and papers, because things are hidden and forgotten.

Oh, and I watch the "Hoarders" show all the time - it makes me feel better about the clutter I'm dealing with. LOL This house is nowhere near as bad as some of those. The clutter here is contained and being dealt with on a weekly basis, at least!

Mom and Dad have saved *everything* over the years. When I moved in when Dad passed away, I started the cleanout process. Mom is more amenable to it than Dad would have been. Old cottage cheese containers, old empty pill bottles, old plastic takeout food containers, old paper bags, plastic bags, even old clothes, coats and boots from the 70's that no one in the family can even wear anymore. Unfortunately, most of these things were kept in the basement of the house, which is moist and anything kept down there tends to get mildewed - so everything down there was ruined. Between the junk haul-out (which has taken me months, and still isn't done), and the remodeling being done, I seriously owe our trash collectors some cookies! And it's amazing what some people will pick up out of the trash - bags of mildewed old blankets and afghans that reek to the high heavens of must and mildew, boxes of old magazines and books covered with mildew - all picked up by someone who thought they had value. To each their own, though I suspect the blanket lady might have gotten a nasty surprise when she opened those trash bags and got a whiff of how bad those blankets smelled, and found the mildew stains on them.

And the paper...oh my gosh. Dad saved every single receipt, handwritten note, scrap of paper, utility bill and paystub for the last 50 years, I think. All of the bills for every year are bundled together with rubber bands, check copies stapled to each bill, and all in a big ziploc bag with the year on them. They are *everywhere*. When he ran out of room in his big 4-drawer file cabinet, he stashed them in his closet. When he ran out of room there, he stacked them on top of the file cabinet. When that pile threatened to topple over, he bought *another* cabinet to put them in. So now I'm burning up the shredder getting rid of all but the ones that need to be kept (tax returns, etc).

It seems every time I open a door or drawer, I find more and more stuff that needs to be gone through and cleaned out. One of these days I'll get it all done, but not sure if it will be soon!

Mom and Dad were not what you would call "classic hoarders" where the house is filled from floor to ceiling or anything, but there are definitely some major "stuff piles" stuck away behind closet and cabinet doors and in that basement! I still have to figure out how to get the huge old cabinet stereo (record player, radio, etc all in a huge console cabinet from the 70's) up the basement stairs.

Burnedout13, "the accumulator", I like that term, good one :)

My Mom [97] is trying to get Dad [93] to go through all his 3-right binders of which he has many dozens, as Dad liked to cut out newspaper articles and tape them onto sheets to go into the notebooks. So right now around Dad's recliner, around his desk, and around his computer it looks like file cabinets had thrown up... paper everywhere, large sheets of paper, tiny bits of paper, etc. All those 3-ring binders will probably outlive him as he will pick up one newspaper article, read it for probably the 100th time, then he will talk about what is in that article, then decide he will need to save it. Thank goodness Mom has this under some control.

Get clear plastic trash bags, extra strength. Check with the Salvation Army and Good Will if they will come pick up. Bag up everything salvageable or supervise the bagging and pay somebody stronger than you are. Some areas have estate sale specialists who can come in and organize/sell the stuff...you may get a little$ out of it, depending on the mess. When it's just garbage that's left or if you don't have the mental/physical energy for this, then seriously: call crime scene cleaners. Every town has them. It all goes to the dump. I still feel bad, but it's done.

Wow! I thought I was the only one dealing with "the accumulator". I spent two months clearing out my parents' home of 55 years. It was really scary. They lived in the Midwest and in the Midwest, there are basements, garages and attics. My dad is a paper hoarder, never seen anything like it. He had every tax return since 1951. Prior to 2000, every paper had a social security number as the ID. It took forever to shred all of this junk. He is on every mailing list in the country - politicians, PACs, help the homeless animals in New York ( he hasn't been to NY in 70 years) For 4 years, I couldn't use my dining room table because of all of the "important stuff" on it. I got a dumpster when I moved them from their home and he would go through it at night and take stuff out. It was a real battle. He would say that all of this stuff was his life. Now that he is in AL, the staff is on me all of the time about the boxes of papers and the absolute clutter from his "important" stuff. I tell them this is their battle - not mine. I refuse to participate. If I offer to throw away anything, he says - no I need to review all of these things - these are important to me and might be important to our future.
Perhaps, when pigs fly. On the other end, I have started throwing away everything in my house. I might end up with one cup, one plate and one place setting. I might be taking minimalism to a new level but after this experience, my son won't have to dig through generations of junk. It is an illness - and a remnant of a depression era person that gets validation from "important people" contacting him.

My parents are hoarders since I was a child, just getting worse and worse over the years. My sister tried living with them and did a full cleanout and refurbishing of the house (but circumstances required her to move away). My parents lawyer set up a financial management person to help get my parents organized and moved into independent living, so they had only seen my parent's house in the post-hoard refurbished state.

Then after a couple month of my parents in independent living, the financial management person wrote me:
"We have a question...your parents have refused our assistance in unpacking boxes and have asked to have many more things in their relatively small apartment than we would normally advise clients. Could you describe in general what your parents' home was like prior to the "organization" which your sister and her husband did? We do not want to press them to live someone else's life style, but we also don't want to leave them with an apartment full of moving boxes with which they are unable to manage."

The financial management person and I had a chat after that and I showed her some 'before' pictures that I had taken of the house a few years ago, which practically knocked her off her chair.

My mother is a hoarder and I have slowly worked with her to get rid of some things and it was very difficult. She agreed to get rid of some plastic containers and some plastic bags. We didn't get very far. Another problem was her "recycling." I would enter the kitchen and smell a bad smell. there would be some food rotting in a pan and there would be fruit flies. she did not object to getting rid of that. she kept food to give to the ferral cats that she fed and other stuff It was hard for her to get rid of anything. I did as much as I could with her. Sorted some clothing together and got rid of a few items. she kept Dan's clothing after he died. When my sister visited she said in Mom's presence that she should just rent a dumpster and clean out the basement. I said that you don't do it that way that you involve Mom.
That remark was so cold and I walked away. My sister says what she thinks and never sugar-coat it. Not my style. And regarding getting rid of trash and paper and cans, these were put in bags and still in the house after a few weeks. I would either get the bags into the garage or into my car. she didn't have any dumpsters and lived in a rural area and didn't get much help in getting it out to the curb. Mom would sort piles of photographs, bills, etc. but not much was organized. It seemed to be hard for her to decide how to organize it. Now she is in a nursing home and my brother has control of her home. I don't know if Mom will be coming home or not. I don't know what shape her home is in but my brother has control over that. There is so much to say about the subject of hoarding. You do what you gotta do.God bless.

I remember reading something about depression. To sum it up it said that a lot of depression was caused by clutter. (Too much stuff) I can see that in my own life.
You get rid of the clutter and the depression or at least 90% of it goes away. My own house has too much stuff in it that we will never use but might be good stuff. There are things in my house that I would like done but don't feel like doing them because it is too overwheling as far as time goes. Working backwards is a good policy so things don't get worse. You get more pleasure going to the re-cycling center than you get buying something new that you MIGHT use some day. I try to buy things that I will use in the next 3 days. Things I really need. My depression has increased because of the care of my 89 year old parents who will not throw anything away including JUNK mail. Their dementia has made it impossible to figure out what mail is important and what mail is not. Including empty enevelopes that they take the junk mail out of. They have been married for 65 years and stuff means more to them than people or personal relationships. Very Very sad..
I am an only child and my daughter is an only child. I don't want to do this to her.

This is a very bad situation, especially for families having to deal with this in their busy lives. If you don't do this now... it may be worse later... I agree with just about everyone on this thread... Keep the momentum going and try not to give it a second thought!... (Everyone with be healthier for it being gone!)

We had a recent garage sale to cut down on the stuff my husband has been buying, collecting and storing at our house. We've had to do this before but each time the garage sale process got worse. He was agreeable to having the sale but I had to most of the work except for moving a few heavy things. He cursed me out for both days, constantly. If I was friendly to the neighbors who came by to look I was a slut. He can't tell being friendly from flirting. Of course the name calling was in private, he showtimed in front of others. I realized that the disruption that comes with a yard sale was waaaay too far out of the routine for him to ever deal with again, much less put me through that abuse. He always says he is going to go through his stuff and donate or sell it. The garage and a spare bedroom are full of stuff. It's mostly on ground level and not stacked to the ceiling with mountains to climb over. (There are photos on hoarding help sites that let you determine the severity of the problem.). Yet with all his stuff, he knows if I have moved something. It's like if he can't see it he can't find it, so needs to have it at hand. Of course he has lots of things he's forgotten about. He was abused as a child and never had a toy. Now he's like a jaybird picking up shiny stuff to bring home to the nest. I have turned out to be quite good at decorating with Goodwill finds. Things he has got to have and loves eventually are salable. No telling when something he would rather divorce me over to keep now can be sold. Things show up (like a large white leather sofa standing on end in the dining room because there was no room for it otherwise) and things disappear (like my laundry basket or a kitchen appliance from the counter). It is unnerving to not know what will have come or gone when you come home. This "collecting" is annoying and costly, but at least he's buying it and not shoplifting like others with FTD. I am working on trying to reclaim space and order and actually progressed on my stuff. I got depressed and neglected what I should have been doing. If anyone needs help in dealing with having routines and getting your living space back to a normal condition I recommend Flylady.net. She herself was once hospitalized for depression. Her free website is positive, supportive and insightful. Just trust her, you can't go wrong. (PS, she does not recommend yard sales....I should have listened.)

Houseplant102, I love your empty box strategy - it is brilliant!

If one does feel bad about getting rid of the stuff, I would encourage them to focus on the good that will be done by either selling in a rummage sale or donating to less fortunate people who can, and will, actually use the stuff. Any money made from from the sale could be used for the ongoing care of the elder. So, all this is a process that benefits others.
However, I do understand that it can mark a major transition into the final years of the elders' lives, and a huge wake-up call about a finite future to the ones who are doing the purging. For me, it was the great life lesson about the importance of relationships and experiences....not stuff!

I'm sorry to hear you must endure this whole thing. I so believe many, like you, are put through an additional grieving process when dealing with stuff. You just need to decide to act in your best interest as well as your moms. Grab the stuff and get rid of it. I'm thankful that others like you have shared your experience, as it really brings home the fact that we have to have a strategy to employ for our survival and sanity. That said, here's the strategy my family used:
For those who still have some other options here is what my family did: I would clear out a few items each vacation visit. My brother lives 4 hours away and his sisters are several states away. I did a silent, visual inspection each time I visited. They were not even using/accessing items on the highest shelves or the attic. So I started by boxing those up and donating. I knew they would put nothing more up there as they had already given up climbing ladders. Then I looked in drawers and closets. Clothes that had obviously not been touched were donated. Items of question were put into the trash cart only the night before trash pick-up. I started cleaning out the "junk" drawers in the utility room. I guess I was using a process of elimination, starting at the least threatening position and working forward. Friends felt they shouldn't take the items of value - china, sports equipment, firearms and tools. We told them it was of tremendous help because if they didn't take it, it would just go to the rummage sale. I convinced a couple to take a few items they didn't want, deliver them to the thrift. In exchange, they kept the donation receipt so they could use it for taxes. Thrift stores often give the donor a card or receipt where you can write in what you donated, and give it a dollar value. Mom was moved to her apartment very soon after Dad's death. I'm still going through some small stuff - it gets mailed to me from CA and NV to GA. My brother put some boxes in his garage in NV. My brother also took a few boxes to her new apartment and this gives her some chance to go through stuff. My brother sifts through the stuff that's in his garage. Mom has been going through stuff in several boxes at her apartment. This sort of creates a division of labor without Mom's thinking she's only part of a campaign to get rid of stuff. Some small items and the china have been shipped to me and my sister. My brother takes her to the post office or UPS once in a while. This helps keep her involved in the decision making process. So, even several states and two years later, we're all helping sift through things and keep what we really want and donate the rest. I've received some pictures and military memorabilia of Dad's - the lightweight items easy to ship.
Another idea about clearing the garage and attic after our parents were obviously not using the stuff - those items were discreetly donated. I returned the emptied boxes to the garage and attic and arranged them in the order in which they were previously stacked. Thus, it appeared everything was in it's rightful place. Items in boxes were donated and I brought the boxes back, arranged them on the upper shelves the way they had always been. This return-the-boxes technique helps set the stage for when we really have to haul. A number of empty boxes are immediately available and this little trick helps because we can clean up with out it being obvious and upsetting to our parents.

Jessiemae, your story about your husband's sister reminded me of the time when my father's mother passed, and everyone gathered at my grandparent's house after the funeral. Well, my hoarder mother immediately began going through my grandmother's closet, and came out to the living room wearing a pair of my grandmother's shoes and showing off her find to everyone. Even at 22, I was appalled and SO embarrassed! These people have no sense of social appropriateness, because their focus is on stuff instead of people/relationships.

My husband's sister is a hoarder. Notice I didn't call her my SIL. Yes, hoarding is just a symptom of mental illness. She is a total nut case that can't get along with anyone. She has no friends, so my idea is that her junk takes the place of people in her life. She moved in with my 92yr. old MIL about a year and a half ago supposedly to take care of her. She actually mentally abused her and totally filled the house with her nasty filthy junk. MIL died about a month ago, but before she died, my husband had to put her in a NH because of nutty sister. Sister is staying in the house and I'm sure she hasn't parted with any of the junk. There were a lot of silk flowers and potted plants sent to the funeral by friends of mine and my husbands. As soon as everybody left the cemetery, she went to work and carried all the flowers back to her house. Just crazy!! At least the funeral director gave us the cards so we could write thank you notes. Not one flower was from anyone other than our friends. It is just like she has to have everything that had to do with her mother. She even had the funeral director take off MIL's glasses and give them to her before the casket was closed. Anyway, to answer your question, I wouldn't feel bad about throwing away a hoarders collection. It would make me mad that I had to clean up the mess.

I never felt bad or guilty for getting rid of the hoard of trash in my mother's home when she went into a nursing home. The importance of her worthless "stuff" had always taken precedence over her relationship with me and anyone else, and there was a certain healing element for me to be able to rid it from my life.
To this day, at 96 and all-consumed with dementia, she continues to hoard stuff in her room at the nursing home....used plastic spoons and cups, plastic bags, condiments & sugar packets from the dining room, anything else she can pick up without anyone catching her. Such a sad state, to not be able to connect with anyone/anything other than a plastic spoon.

well I guess my first question is if she is in a nursing home is she going to ever have the opportunity to actually go back to the horde. if not really does she even have to know the horde is gone. we just spent the last year getting rid of my mil horde and repairing all the damage it caused so the house was marketable. my mil lives with us for past year due to a stroke and mental issues - dementia, psychosis etc. we took her to the house with 4 storage tubs and told her she could take anything that was clean, not broken, and fit into the tubs. she didn't like it but it had to be done. I don't have room for that stuff. 5 dumpsters later, 5 mos of repairs, and an exterminator we finally have the house in shape. I did feel bad at first but in the end we knew this was the best for her and it is ok for her to be mad about it.

Missme - Try to get rid of stuff now!!!! I have spent weeks getting the stuff out of my moms's house and I live here. She would say that she did not know that she might need it. It was not needed. I guess growing up during the depression they did not want to let go of anything. Please do it now!! Take care of YOU!!!!

malarky, friendof,
my mother left a personal safe full of old coins. i dont need a hobby of pricing every piece, then getting ripped off after hundreds of hours of lamedumbshit -ed- ness. i gave that liability to the first volunteer. im more into trimming the loosefitting cutoffs off of a woman, a sliver at a time with sharp scissors , as opposed to haggling over a nickle thats now worth 5 cents.

" i burn things "

It may be junk to you, but to another crafter, it might be cool stuff. There are estate sale companies that can sell that "stuff" to people who want it. Not saying that there's much money in it, but 1) you would be honoring your mother's hobby and years of collecting and 2) you would be saving things from going to the trash before their useful life is over. Estate sale companies work at all levels - low end to high end. You just have to find the right one.

Mom collected all sorts of stuff, but we moved it all on. I recycled her piles and piles of papers and magazines. We never used a dumpster and she had a large, FULL house. People buy those old spices, cooking things, clothes (think of theaters, too, for period clothes), etc.

The estate sale company will help because it is in their best interest to have the goods clean and organized. But you need to go through everything, first, like others have said, to be sure not to miss hidden money or something valuable stashed away.

Good luck!

I do believe going through Mom's house and enduring the estate sale was the hardest thing I've ever done. I thought about it daily for a couple of years after. Now I still think about it, but a little less frequently.

And there is always Freecycle. One guy went and "freecycled" his parent's entire home, building materials and all. And captain, I think you need to get yourself an audience with the current Pope. I think he would like you, and share a Peroni or two with you, even if he didn't quite agree with all your philosophies.