My Papa has Parkinson’s and was in a NH two years ago, when he talked his doctor into letting him go home. Everyone here thought the doctor had lost his mind, to put it kindly.
He’s steadily gone downhill, as expected, at 92 with this disease. He’s down to 124# and so weak he fell and was hospitalized. He failed the hospital PT test, so could not be released home (Hallelujah).
So, he was sent to the NH on Tuesday. Wednesday, they banned all visitors due to the corona virus, per the CDC and the Governor of Florida. I have searched cdc.gov and the Florida website and I do not see any mandatory ban - it’s just a suggestion.
What do you all think? Should I push back, because he’s new there and confused? Or leave it alone, and he won’t be able to see us for God knows how long? I understand their logic. My sister wants to bring him home. What are your NHs doing? The one day we were there, we had to fill out a form and use hand sanitizer in front of staff.
One family had a devastating day. Their Mom turned 100 yesterday. They came with a huge cake, balloons, presents - but they were turned away.
I would imagine that the family whose day was “devastating” would most likely feel worse if their mom were taken y the virus rather than celebrating with them.
The reality is that the age group served by NHs and ALs is the MOST VULNERABLE to catastrophic symptoms, so the best way to address this disease is to avoid it.
I’m very grateful that highest security is available to my LO. She deserves the very best I can get for her, which in this case I AM CERTAIN, is total isolation.
As others have said, the nursing homes are restricting visitors to protect their community at large, since the vast majority of them (Papa included) are in the high-risk group for Covid-19 (and all illnesses)
If it’s any comfort to you, we did the same, though not because of the threat of a virus. The first two days after I took Mom to the AL were horrendous. Everything you can imagine with her wanting to come home, following me down the hall, begging to leave, etc. But then the facility suggested that I stay away for two weeks to let her settle in and trust them. They were so compassionate and caring, the director took my hand and looked me in the eye and said, “Jill, we’ve got this. This is the best thing for your mom and she will settle in better without your visits for a couple of weeks.” I couldn’t imagine how my mom was going to get through that. It broke my heart. I left in tears. But I knew that the director had done this with countless families and the residents looked happy and acclimated.
I touched base with the director every day and of course had my caregivers’ watchful eyes on her. Toward the end of the two weeks, the director suggested another week, for a total of three weeks.
Lo and behold, Mom did settle in. It was the absolute right thing to do. It made Mom much less anxious, much more accepting of the fact that this was her home now and she could trust her new friends and neighbors.
I’m not trying to sugarcoat it, of course there were (and still are) difficult days, but it got easier and easier and there’s no question that my entrusting her in their care in the beginning without agitating Mom with my daily visits in those first three weeks helped a lot.
I know first-hand how difficult this is going to be for you, but I think you may find that this is the best thing for your Papa.
I love the suggestion about FaceTime or other video capabilities. Surely a nurse or care partner there can at least show your Papa pictures of you and hopefully even arrange for a video call. Does he have a window that you could have him look out of and see you wave at him if the quarantine extends past the two weeks? Can he manage phone calls with you? Again, maybe after he has the two weeks to settle in.
He will settle in and you’ll get through this. A big hug to you.
Jill
My sisters NH like I believe all of US NH’s is on lockdown. No communal dining or activities. Residents are relegated to their rooms, and that has to confuse my sister, her dementia won’t allow her to understand why she can’t toodle around in a wheelchair. The boredom will be overwhelming.
Sorry for your situation.
Stay well.
Some people recommend not going the first week or so in a normal nursing home placement situation, I don’t think it would be a good thing to complicate and even compromise his circumstances.
It's for the safety of all the nursing home residents including your own Ioved one - and the staff. You don't want staff getting sick and then the NH is understaffed . . .
So no push-back on this rule for now.
A person can get. "Dressed out" as if they were going into a clean room.
Its your loved one, helpless and scared. You know that if your person is a "fall risk" then most likely will drug them to keep them quite, not making any problems. They are short of staff and it only takes a little too much Haldol and by, by person.
There maybe decitions that need to be made regarding that person's health, are they going to ignore you?
This is going to be rough on him, but it will, hopefully, help him settle in, since this may be a permanent placement.