He is at a stage where he is trying to escape and is now falling and getting hurt. Police have picked him up several times and brought him home - so this has been documented. If he should get seriously injured or worse hit by a car and killed, would my husband, the POA, be liable? The parents should be in a care facility, not safe for them to be in their home alone but I have no authority.
I'd also explore protecting FIL's assets. If FIL wanders into traffic and causes others to get hurt, the injured or estate of the victims, may seek damages from FIL. The fact that the had dementia may not preclude him from liability. There are so many liability issues that could be possible. It sure seems like a risky thing to sit by and allow to happen. I'd get legal advice PRONTO and treat it as an emergency.
Let's just NOT focus on the inevitable serious injury or killed by a car.
Get your parent placed safely now. Focus on getting the care he needs unless the POA has everything to gain by doing nothing. imo.
Parents never expect money when they raise you from birth to adulthood, so why would anyone do the same for caring for a vulnerable elderly parent, just to save money on much needed care. We are past the times of Charles Dickens with Oliver, surely.
Put their health and safety above money.
If you feel you have no say over this and you fear the worst, then report it to the relevant authority anonymously if you're worried about comeback.
In the U.K. we have Social Services for the elderly and disabled, as well as for children.
I'm confused why your husband was given POA for your parent though. Is your husband controlling at home and appears like a saint to outsiders. If so, report anonymously. This is your parent after all.
How would you like your children and their spouses to treat you. Set an example, otherwise you might find yourself in the same crappy situation as your parent.
I am hoping that someone else with a better grasp of the law can answer this.
We have a Memory care facility in our neighborhood. Probably once a week, some resident sneaks out and this staff is really sharp and on task--the wanderers "sneak into" a group of people who go there to sing to them, and pow, you have a runner. There's one gent who escapes, walks about 100 yards and back and comes back to his room. He just needs to be free, I guess, but even though he IS wearing a "monitor" it cannot be heard over the sound of the doorbell (alarm) going off as we come and go.
I'd hate to be his POA.
Probably differs from state to state.
Mother FINALLY stopped when she had her hip replaced and required the use of a walker, 24/7. Brother made her show him how she would maneuver that and herself into the car. She couldn't even begin to do it, so the car keys were taken and she figured out other transportation. At first she was beyond furious, as I am sure anyone would be--that's the last "freedom"! But when we asked her how she'd feel if she hit a child or caused a serious accident--she saw the light.
Sometimes it just takes a good talking to--sometimes you have to take the car keys or put a lock on the steering wheel.
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