I have said no to this. I am the caregiver for my parents,taking care of all their finances, their home. They are i Assisted Living now..but still I am the caregiver. I have only 1 brother. He has distanced himself big time. He could drive down and visit--only a 6 hour dirive, but he is "to busy with his work and family" So it is just me and I do it with a happy heart for my parents. My parents are coming into a little bit of a settlement..about 10,000 and they want me to have it. My brother knows about this settlement and I do not want to make "waves" with him. He basically has done very very little for them. Should I take the money..what I will do is just hold it in case my parents need it. I do not want to spend their money on myself. But I do not want my brother to get it either. He was always a good brother until my parents went down hill fast due to a car accident--not their fault. He has distanced himself and only calls them 1 or 2 times a month.. I am thankful they are in a good Assisted Living ( yes..I found the place and got them there) But I do everything else. I have the POA on all their accounts. I ask him for help to call the lawyers, but he never does it..It is my responsibility. I just cannot understand him at all at these times. He only lives a 6 hour drive away...When OUR parents had the car accident and in the hospital..He never came...then he went on a beach vacation with his family. He says..I have the parents and he has the kids. ( I am divorced and never had children of my own..2 misscarriages, but no living children) He seems to be mean to me these days. I just let it roll off my back and pay him no mind at all. I am in good counseling now too and she says the same thing..Let it go with your brother...but she does think I should take the money my parents are offering as it is their way of saying "Thank you" when they are still alive. It is a shame what happens to sibblings at the time of crisis. I guess you find out the true colors.
Take the money. You are the caregiver and I would imagine that you have given up quite a lot to care for your parents. I would imagine that you have also made financial sacrifices along the way as well. Most of us do. If your parents are in a position to give it then take it and thank them for their generosity. If the offer of that money hangs out there too long something may come along and it will be gone. There's nothing wrong with accepting it.
it is wonderful to hear for once that parents are appreciative enough of a daughter to want to reward her for the sacrifices she has made.
Nice to see!
However the IRS and Medicaid look-back are 2 different things. Medicaid is a financial need program, so when you apply they look back 5 years and whatever gifts you made create a penalty period. Each state has a formula, so you give away $5000 or $100,000, or you sell a house to your son for under market value, the value of these gifts is applied against a formula that accounts for the daily cost of medicaid, the state then imposes a penalty period to the elder during which they are not eligible for medicare. So, the lesson is, if you are going to be old and generous, make sure whomever you bestow your generosity upon has your back if you need it,
You cannot get blood from a turnip, but the State does not have to subsidize the turnip either. This look-back period was instituted because people were shifting assets at end of life to become instant poor and eligible for medicaid, hence taxpayers were subsidizing inheritances.