For me I feel it will would be HUGE HUGE HILL TO CLIMB WISH I as one of those people that comment that makes them feel good they are taking care of loved one feels like they got purpose great but for me opposite and wish I knew why I feel like this I DO NOT FEEL LIKE I HAVE A PURPOSE FEEL LIKE A waste would it be ;possible that I feel like this due to to much anger and negative feelings? Hope you all are doing well take care Sandyy22
Back to the original poster...Sandy22, I feel that way a lot of the time. Our upbringing, the care we received from the person we are now caring for has, in my opinion , a big part to play in how we perceive what is before us. I've had my beloved dog longer than I lived with my parent's.... yet, I felt more empathy than all 3 brothers towards my mother.
Now my biggest problem is finding that "peace" in the decision I made to care for her.
KC any care agency would love to have you. Go sign up.
Cap, maybe she is worried you'll fall off the wagon. Maybe she knows someone else who needs a miracle and can't find one. Ya never know.
If we look beyond, though, and go inside ourselves, we know how important we are. It isn't really just about the care receiver, it is the whole family. We often complain about siblings that don't help, but we may actually be what we're doing to help them. It is like we have their back and they don't even realize it.
Now if someone I am helping would just buy me some new clothes... or maybe a new car... I like to think when this is over that something magical is going to happen. However, I may simply be facing the reality of being a lonely old woman if it goes on much longer. What a horrible possibility to think about. That sounds like something worth fighting against. (Pardon the rambling. I am just thinking out loud.)
Once we found out that my dad would never get out of the nursing home I had to make a lot of changes and FAST since I couldn't afford the house in which we lived all on my own. I rented a condo that I love and got a job. It's been a year now of being on my own and while I'm not exactly living the life I would like to live it's better than being chained to the house all day everyday.
Yes, I think it's not only possible but probable that you feel the way you do because of anger and negative feelings. Regardless of whether you have good reason to feel like that or not anger and negative emotions make us unhappy. Try to find a way to unload that stuff, do some things for yourself. See a movie. Read a great book. Call up a friend and have lunch. Those are just some of the things I do now that add some pleasure to my life. Today I got a haircut, got my nails done, and whitened my teeth and I feel like a million bucks. In a little while I'm going to watch Netflix and finish off my evening with a good book. We have to participate in activities we enjoy. I wasn't so good at that when I was caring for my dad but I didn't know how to do that stuff when I was caring for him. My entire life revolved around my dad. Now I can see that it didn't have to. I wish someone had pointed that out to me then.