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I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
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I have to young children with my husband, and they need my support. His ex wife states it's in his will that I can not attend but I don't believe he would do that. If he did what rights do I have as his wife?
Have you actually seen the will? I would think that you have every right to attend. He should have changed POAs after marrying you, but too late for that.
Since POA ends upon death, she would not be able to use the power of the POA to exclude you from the funeral. I would think that the will would have to go through the courts to have any legal authority (won't have time before the funeral)
I would find out what his current wishes are now and if he is able to, see if he wants to change his POA or will.
Now, you may not have given us all of the information. For example, if you two are estranged and he is back with her, that would change a lot in my opinion. Then, I think you would accede to his/her wishes so as not to cause drama at the funeral.
How unusual, for a man with two young children by his second wife to appoint his ex-wife to act with POA for him.
You're sure her POA documentation is valid, are you? Is there any possibility of checking this with your husband?
Should it turn out, by the way, that she is relying on a will made prior to their divorce, and that what she actually means is that in that will she was appointed her husband's executor, which is a different thing altogether... well, anyway, you'd have to check this but as far as I know divorce automatically invalidates a will. And she would therefore be talking through her hat.
Look. It may well be, in the end, that her melodramas are not worth your attention. That it would be better for you and your children to avoid the funeral, and take your leave of your husband while he is still with you. Truly, it wouldn't be the end of the world.
But do this because it's the dignified choice. Not purely on the dodgy say-so of someone who really sounds as if she's trying to pull a fast one.
It is not in his will to exclude you from the funeral. I never heard of such a thing. Are there any other forms where it would be appropriate to document his wishes, like a last wishes document? That may be ex's wishes, but so what. Has your relationship always been stressed with her?
If I wanted to exclude someone form attending my funeral, the will is the last place I would document it. Most wills are private - so no one knows the contents - and are often not opened until some time after the funeral. If you put specific burial wishes there, there is a good chance they won't be seen until after the funeral anyway.
My husband's and my wills are sealed and on file at the courthouse. I am pretty sure that you would need a death certificate to have them opened. and the death certificate does not usually come for a couple of weeks (or, at least my Dad's didn't).
He has brain cancer, just started new treatment Dec 13, 2016 and we were living separate. His ex wife ended up moving in with him though. Jan 3, 2017 will made, Feb 13,2017 in hospital makes it back home on hospice but passes March. Me and him talked on Feb 15 he said will not done.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Since POA ends upon death, she would not be able to use the power of the POA to exclude you from the funeral. I would think that the will would have to go through the courts to have any legal authority (won't have time before the funeral)
I would find out what his current wishes are now and if he is able to, see if he wants to change his POA or will.
Now, you may not have given us all of the information. For example, if you two are estranged and he is back with her, that would change a lot in my opinion. Then, I think you would accede to his/her wishes so as not to cause drama at the funeral.
You're sure her POA documentation is valid, are you? Is there any possibility of checking this with your husband?
Should it turn out, by the way, that she is relying on a will made prior to their divorce, and that what she actually means is that in that will she was appointed her husband's executor, which is a different thing altogether... well, anyway, you'd have to check this but as far as I know divorce automatically invalidates a will. And she would therefore be talking through her hat.
Look. It may well be, in the end, that her melodramas are not worth your attention. That it would be better for you and your children to avoid the funeral, and take your leave of your husband while he is still with you. Truly, it wouldn't be the end of the world.
But do this because it's the dignified choice. Not purely on the dodgy say-so of someone who really sounds as if she's trying to pull a fast one.
My husband's and my wills are sealed and on file at the courthouse. I am pretty sure that you would need a death certificate to have them opened. and the death certificate does not usually come for a couple of weeks (or, at least my Dad's didn't).
I don't think you can place any reliance on what was said to you by a patient undergoing treatment or palliative measures for brain cancer.
How are you managing? Are you okay?