Dad is 91 and is in excellent health and quite capable of managing his affairs on his own. He has decided to sell his house and move into an apartment in an independent living senior community. I'm thrilled that he came to this decision on his own as I was beginning to be concerned with him trying to maintain his house. I live in a different state and am not able to help him as much as I would like. He refuses to come and live with my wife and I. We would both love to have him.
Is it advisable, or reasonable, for my brother or I to have a POA while dad is still capable? I'm afraid it might be insulting to him if I even suggest it.
With all these changes willingly by dad, it's the perfect time to sit down and approach the subject.
Good for you!
Ask your Dad what would he do if he was rushed to the ER, who would be his voice if he couldn't speak for one reason or another. He would need someone to be his medical POA. I am sure he would understand the reasoning behind that... make an appointment with an Elder Law attorney who can then bring up the subject of financial POA, updating a Will or Trusts, etc.
I've been trying to get my parents to update their POA as they have each other as their POA. Couple weeks ago my Dad was rushed to the ER after a bad fall. I was there with him. When he was feeling better but still in the hospital, I told him I shouldn't be making any medical decisions for him [like saying yes for him to stay overnight in the hospital], that Mom was his medical POA... well, my Mom is 96, has lost most of her hearing/eyesight, even though she is still very sharp she couldn't hear 90% of what a doctor would be telling her. Then and only then did Dad realize he has to update the POA's.
As others have said, it is necessary to draw up these documents while the person is still competent, though they may resist. Your dad must have an attorney and other professionals who do work for him They would be good people to approach your dad if you think he will resist the idea from you and your bro. Good luck.