My 43 year old brother lives with my parents. He is an alcoholic and will not admit his problem. He has begun to get mean when he is drunk and drinks until he passes out many times. About 6 months ago he screamed at and cussed at my 77 year old Daddy for hours. It took my husband and 3 sons to keep him from hurting him. He tried to break the window out of the car that my Daddy was sitting in so that he could hit him. My Mother is extremely protective of him and I feel somewhat paralyzed in my ability to help them. I don't know what my rights are and I need some advice. Last week he was found passed out and he was taken to the hospital. His blood alcohol level was .43. What is the best way for me to proceed the next time he gets drunk. It happens about every 6 weeks. What can I do legally and can I keep him from them? Thank you for your help in advance.
Were the police advised of the assault, or just of the drunk and disorderly aspect?
Take your father to the ER, now, advising he was kicked in the back, and indicate that you want to determine if there are any spinal or soft tissue injuries. And that should be done anyway, even if the brother wasn't involved.
After that, get a copy of the medical record (all, everything in the chart, from x-rays to notes) and if it shows evidence of the kick, take it to the police and state that you want to file (a) assault charges, and (b) get a PPO against your brother.
You'll probably be referred to an agency either of law enforcement or county administration for consideration of a PPO. If the latter, prepare a history of past attacks, harassment, attempts to get money, threats, etc. and take the list along to be added as an exhibit to the PPO Petition.
Who witnessed the assault and texted you and your siblings? That person would be an ideal person to accompany you to the police and PPO departments.
Has your mother ever been threatened? Even if not, she should be added to the protected list of any PPO as she's apparently been pestered by brother in the past.
Does your brother already have a criminal record, including for drug use? If so, is he on parole? If he is, assault on a person is most likely a parole violation. Call the state prison department if you have to and find out who his parole officer is and report the assault to him/her.
My ex always had similar blood alcohol levels as your brother. When he would go to the hospital they would read him from between .38 and .48 every time. The seriousness of this cannot be properly explained...this is organ damage range. If he is allowed to continue he will die...let him do that on his own, not with your wonderful daddy watching and being hurt by it. Get him out of that house legally, and do not let him back. If he wants to get help after that, then good for him. But your daddy should come first.
Angel #2
A restraining order won't work unless you can find a way to make him move first. He's sick - try to remember that. But being a sick alcoholic doesn't give him the right to hurt others. The only way he'll face his problem seems to be through something harsh, so you may have to call 9-1-1 the next time there's a problem. It will be hard to do and to go through your parents' emotions with them, but this can't go on. For your parents' safety, your brother must get help.
You could call Social Services Adult Protective Services and see if they have other ideas about how you can help your parents.
Take care of yourself, too,
Carol