Drs have ran test but can't find anything. She is 83 and she admitted herself to a personal care last year saying she can't take care of herself. She's over weight and suffers from COPD refuses to do any kind of activity just sits in a chair all day long. She's very scared to even take a car ride. The doctors didn't even want to admit her to the hospital this time but my husband insisted they said that all the preliminary test came back normal. It seams that when I elderly person has been in the hospital more then average & nothing that is major the doctors don't want to be bothered. Has any one experienced this. My husband is tired of fighting with doctors.
MIL has COPD and is grossly overweight. It really is too much effort to get ready and go out so why other. Why does she have to "do" anything. Sitting and watching the world go by is often interesting enough. Things are not "good' for an elderly person if there is no pleasure in it. Some exercise might be appropriate if it contributes to her health but she won't be a self starter.
A large amount of food is not essential but liquid is helpful again in reasonable amounts. Nothing is fixable at this stage so don't run the tests if you are not going to do the treatment and it is not contributing to her quality of life. it is a very hard stage to accept but try and put yourself in her position and think about what you would want.
Since she is in a care center why is your husband trying to wake her? Or is he telling doctors that she needs to get up after a certain number of hours of sleep? Mom needs her sleep and the amount of sleep she gets does not effect how much she will sleep through the day. To try to have her more wakeful, I am afraid is a losing battle. I used to joke that we needed a cattle prod to keep mom from sleeping so much. Because of the amount of sleep she got she missed visitors and activities, but it is what it is.
Hubby needs to relax, pick his battles, it is much more important that mom gets the sleep she needs. Her brain is broken and old. The elderly need much more sleep than what other people consider normal. What is normal? That varies from person to person. At one time in mom's life six hours was normal as she aged it increased to ten hours, now it is 12-15 hours. Following a flu shot mom slept 20 hours out of 24 for four days following.
Your husband needs to establish a good working relationship with mom's docs. Pick his battles, sleep should not be a concern.
Is the twitching in her sleep bothering her? Has she had a sleep study done?