My dad (84) is still sane, but is being neglected/manipulated financially/mass theft by in-home grand-children. He's had 9 heart attacks, 3 strokes, 14 stints and still lives at home. My sister died of Lupus in 2011 leaving all 3 of her children (25m/23f/21m in 2011) $186k in insurance money. All three were completely broke in 18 months and each came to live with my dad once the money was gone. One has since moved, but the other two remain, but neither works or contributes to the house. My dad pays all of the bills and buys all of the food. They dont even see to it the food gets cook for my dad daily. The house is in disrepair and being greatly neglected on both the interior and the exterior. They have stolen/sold everything of value my dad accumulated over the years. The get $20-$30 from him frequently equaling nearly $1000 monthly (over 40% of his monthly income). My dad complains about all of this frequently but don't want to leave his home of 47+ years and he doesn't want to be alone. I live 75 miles away and my siblings live out of state. My dad's normal weight is usually 150lb when he visits me for a few weeks or if my siblings visit for usually a month at a time. But when he's home with the grandkids his weight quickly goes down to 130lb. If the grandchildren were not manipulating him financially he could afford someone to come in and assist him. So their need of a roof over their heads, food, and a place to rendezvous is being met. But my dad's need of a clean home, the use of his money, and daily meals are not being met. I called elder abuse and they said because my dad is sane their is no abuse. What can my siblings and I do to remove these manipulating grandkids from his home and get him the daily assistance he needs?
Perhaps the answer is to help them launch. How did the one who's left manage it? Might that be an example they could follow?