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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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If he is hallucinating in the very earliest stages, perhaps he doesn't have Alzheimer's, (where hallucinations come later). Could he have Lewy Body Dementia?
In any case, how you respond depends a little on how he responds. Do these hallucinations frighten him? My husband saw his brother (deceased) and flying bats, and even a body in our bed. While these things would have frightened me, he took them all in stride and was not disturbed by them -- just interested.
Just go along with benign hallucinations. (Let's just sleep through the night. If the bats are still here in the morning I'll chase them out with a broom.)
If what he sees is terrifying him, don't argue that it isn't real (you won't win that one) but instead focus on convincing him that he is safe. Put a lotion on him that will keep the imaginary bugs from stinging.
If his response is anger, because he knows or suspects that what he sees is not real and losing his mind is the most frightening thing he can think of, then you need to deal more with his view of dementia and not worry so much about what he sees. Probably these discussions should take place when he is calm, not in the middle of an hallucination.
My husband knew perfectly well he had dementia. This is a terrible, terrible thing to have to acknowledge. I agreed with him that it was awful. I assured him over and over that it was in no way his fault. I promised him that we would get through the journey together. In his more lucid periods we talked about end-of-life issues.
It seems to me that anger is a very appropriate response to knowing your life is changing drastically. It is counter productive if it goes on indefinitely and interferes with getting what pleasure you can from what is left to you.
One thing that helped my husband (and me, too, in a way), was participating in a study that included donating his brain to science, to help future generations avoid his situation. He took that very seriously.
My girlfriend went along with the hallucinations as long as they were pleasant. Once they became fear and rage, she called 911 and had him admitted for a psych eval.
Is he having hallucinations or delusions? Does he think he is actually talking to someone who isn't there, or is he dreaming or day dreaming, and thinks it's real?
He probably needs medication if they are real hallucinations. If they are delusions, I try to meet them part way.
My husband has paranoid worries about a cousin who was mean to him 50 years ago. He thinks he's skulking around our neighborhood planning to beat him up. I've told him that if he wants a gun, he will have to walk to New Hampshire to buy one. But I will buy him an air horn in case he is attacked. So now I have a rational response to his irrational thought processes.
In men, depression often shows up as anger. Probably an antidepressant would help. If necessary, you and the doctor should call it pain medication, because that's what it really is.
I hate it so much when he's unhappy. I know better, but I still feel like a failure as a wife because I can't solve his problems. Best wishes to you both.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
If he is hallucinating in the very earliest stages, perhaps he doesn't have Alzheimer's, (where hallucinations come later). Could he have Lewy Body Dementia?
In any case, how you respond depends a little on how he responds. Do these hallucinations frighten him? My husband saw his brother (deceased) and flying bats, and even a body in our bed. While these things would have frightened me, he took them all in stride and was not disturbed by them -- just interested.
Just go along with benign hallucinations. (Let's just sleep through the night. If the bats are still here in the morning I'll chase them out with a broom.)
If what he sees is terrifying him, don't argue that it isn't real (you won't win that one) but instead focus on convincing him that he is safe. Put a lotion on him that will keep the imaginary bugs from stinging.
If his response is anger, because he knows or suspects that what he sees is not real and losing his mind is the most frightening thing he can think of, then you need to deal more with his view of dementia and not worry so much about what he sees. Probably these discussions should take place when he is calm, not in the middle of an hallucination.
My husband knew perfectly well he had dementia. This is a terrible, terrible thing to have to acknowledge. I agreed with him that it was awful. I assured him over and over that it was in no way his fault. I promised him that we would get through the journey together. In his more lucid periods we talked about end-of-life issues.
It seems to me that anger is a very appropriate response to knowing your life is changing drastically. It is counter productive if it goes on indefinitely and interferes with getting what pleasure you can from what is left to you.
One thing that helped my husband (and me, too, in a way), was participating in a study that included donating his brain to science, to help future generations avoid his situation. He took that very seriously.
He probably needs medication if they are real hallucinations. If they are delusions, I try to meet them part way.
My husband has paranoid worries about a cousin who was mean to him 50 years ago. He thinks he's skulking around our neighborhood planning to beat him up. I've told him that if he wants a gun, he will have to walk to New Hampshire to buy one. But I will buy him an air horn in case he is attacked. So now I have a rational response to his irrational thought processes.
In men, depression often shows up as anger. Probably an antidepressant would help. If necessary, you and the doctor should call it pain medication, because that's what it really is.