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I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Such angst.He can no longer find his way on roads infrequently traveled. His world is shrinking. He thinks he can, but obviously he cannot remember routes that should be familiar. It angers him when I insist on driving or have someone else drive us.
My mother-in-law refused to give up her keys. She had 3 accidents in 2 weeks and still thought she didn't have a problem. What worked for us was taking her to the doctor. We called ahead of time and left a message with our concerns. Then we took her. The doctor gave her a test asking questions such as what year is it, who is president ... things like that. She got all of the questions right. The doctor then told her that she wanted her to see a neurologist. We knew mom, the doctor knew mom but the neurologist knew nobody. He would be absolutely impartial. Mom insisted that she didn't have a problem and this was a waste. Her doctor told her that she could use this to make us leave her alone on the subject. Her doctor made us promise to not bring it up again if the neurologist said she could drive. So we agreed. Mom agreed to go so we would give her the keys back (we had taken them out of her purse and refused to give them back). Mom told him that she had passed all the questions and she be allowed to drive. Her previous doctor had them written down and she had 20 minutes or so to fill it out. This doctor asked them personally to her. So yes, she knew the answers but it took her a while to come up with them. She had to think about it first. He had her get up from her seat, walk around, asked her to pick something up ... he ended up telling her that she had no business driving. If a small child ran in front of her car, by the time she thought to hit the brakes, she could have already run over the child. She's still angry but no longer at us. She's angry at the doctor.
I reminded my mom that long ago she made me promise to take her keys if we ever felt she would be a danger to others behind the wheel. She didn't like it one bit but I did tell her she couldn't drive, took her to get her license renewed (knowing she would fail the eye exam) and let them pull her license. Now she insists that the state ID card is a license and I tell her no, it is just an ID and she is no longer able to drive safely. When she balks I remind her of my promise not to allow her to drive when I felt she would be unsafe. Ends it usually. (OH and to prevent driving, we switched a similar looking key from an old car with the real one, it will go in the ignition but won't start). She hasn't figured that one out yet.
Caregiver Resources I have in CA said this: get the DMV form about these drivers that shouldn't drive (there is a specific form). I didn't need to get the form as Mom is anti-social and gave me the keys already. But there is a special form to save caregivers grief.
When my husband wouldn't agree to stop driving I wrote a letter to his doctor before his appointment explaining why he shouldn't be driving (not knowing his way around, telling me I should be going through red lights while I was driving). Doctor was NO help. He said that with his aunt who had Alzheimer's they waited until she was in an accident then pulled the keys! No way I could risk my husband hurting someone or himself. How irresponsible of his doctor! Next to my husband's neurologist who backed me 100%. From then on my husband was more accepting of not being able to drive. Every time he wanted to I reminded him of the neurologist's insistence he not drive and, luckily, he didn't give me any trouble as he likes his neurologist.
Teaforme-I hope you dropped your doctor when they threw you under the bus. Our neurologist, who I informed prior to our appointment about DH driving, also was no help. I had to take the matters in my own hand when he side swiped a parked car, and I noticed he was using both feet to drive. Anyone dealing with this problem should not wait until the person with dementia hurts himself or someone else. I informed my DH that he hurt someone while he was driving he could lose everything he worked for due to the fact he would be sued for every penny he had. I also informed him that I could be charged because I knew that his diagnosis was dementia.
No my dad was not a doormat - he was a bully. No one's opinions or wishes mattered except his own. He browbeat his wives and children into caving into his whims over and over until we got the hell out. He is in a nursing home, no longer knows who I am, and I really could care less.
In addition to the DMV procedures above, you can dis-engage/have a piece of the inner workings of the car removed so it won't start. This is easier than I am indicating; I don't know the part. However, a person can't drive without it. Best to remove yourself and let MDs and DMV be the 'bad guys.'
I live in a rural area. Recently a 71 year old man pulled off a side road onto the county highway and went head-on into a loaded car carrier. Is it really worth the risk to let them drive? Not only will you lose Grandpa, but Grandma will lose the farm when the other party sues and wins. Everything they worked for all their lives, gone in a flash.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
https://www.agingcare.com/articles/taking-the-keys-what-to-do-if-mom-or-dad-won-t-give-them-up-112307.htm
I didn't need to get the form as Mom is anti-social and gave me the keys already. But there is a special form to save caregivers grief.
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