My 86yo mom just had a major health issue landing in hospital & rehab. Now is home. Primary doc told her "no stairs, no driving--non negotiable". I have the keys, not in the house. She is insisting on me returning the keys before I go on a weekend of respite! Care Manager tells me absolutely not, which I tend to go with. Has anyone any success in HOW to say no????
If you "go with" anyone else besides the care giver, you are being negligent in your responsibilities to your mom -- and every other driver on the road. Period.
My husband is going to be here with her for the weekend....she also has my niece and a nephew close at hand. I am still working on driving resources for her and that is coming along. Time, however, and wait are four letter words for Mom. Patience has never been her thing and now it is really non-existent.
My parents [who are in their 90's] still have a car in their garage. They stopped driving 5 years ago, and I am now their driver.... thus, lucky me, I get to drive that huge cruise ship size of a car.
For some reason, elders feel more secure knowing there is a car in the garage or driveway, and they have access to the keys, even if they no longer drive.
I use to get angry at this, but now I chuckle, as in winter Dad [92] wants to shovel the driveway in case there is an emergency and he and Mom need to get the car out of garage. Emergency? Use their car? Seriously? Nope, any emergency I will be dialing 911 and let the EMT's bring their own vehicles and do the driving :)
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