My step mom has often said she was not ready for assisted living. Then suddenly she changed her mind. She stated that she did not want to be a burden to us anymore. I am flabbergasted. We have never considered her a burden. She has been living independently but has been very lonely since my Dad died a year ago. I help her with some errands (though she is still driving a little) and in the winter, snow shoveling fits in to the list of things we do for her. She is showing some signs of failing memory and false memories of having seen strangers before. I am struggling with guilt and wondering what prompted this sudden change. Anyone else run in to this?
Oh my gosh I wish my aging parents [mid 90's] would have made that decision... I can't get them out of their house at all to go some place more elder friendly. Sure my sig other and I use to shovel their driveway, too, but couple years ago we had to stop because of our own age decline, there was no way we could shovel our own driveway and theirs. We had to stop half the errands, too. And that makes for a lot of unpleasant telephone calls.
I can understand that you might have some anxiety that perhaps something you said or did made her feel unwelcome? But it sounds unlikely - far more probable that she's seen a place she likes the look of and has decided to give it her best shot. If you're still worried, tell her that she hasn't burned her bridges and if doesn't work out for some reason in the future then she can always count on you for help with finding something better.
Please do not question, offer her your total support and enjoy visiting her in her new home.