I have been taking care of my father for 3 plus years. He is now just starting to exhibit apathy, beginning of dementia and is incontinent, all of which my brother is not aware and has never asks me or his father of his health status.
Is it my obligation to inform him, although in the past he downplays his ailments?
I'm in a similar situation. One of my brothers is exactly the same way. He doesn't keep in contact. Maybe on some major holidays. Maybe. When mom or dad are in the hospital, I call him to let him know. I regret it each time. He just storms in and tries to take over implying it was all my fault. But when the rubber hits the road and we actually need him to help out, he's just full of excuses. He can't be bothered.
Sending you a hug and best wishes as you go thru this difficult period with you dear dad