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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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I consent to the collection of my consumer health data.*
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
Feronia, thats not much income, I dont know what State you are in but thats poverty for around here. I only have 2 suggestions, one is call your congressman on the Aide and Attendent application and it gets the ball rolling fast! Second, you can try sittersity or a daycare or care.com and find people who will work for $15 an hour no minimun hours. Its hard to find good people but with time and patience you might be lucky. Good luck, wow 94 thats great!
The problem with all of these options is paying for it. My mother gets $1,200 a month from Soc Sec & $300.00 from a pension. She is 94, disabled and has mild alzheimer's. Right now she lives with my brother who has no life except going to work and caring for her. I travel there as much as I can to help out but she needs more care now than we feel we can provide in the home. MediCal won't help with the cost of in home care because her income is $700 per month more than they allow. All the decent nursing homes want $5,000 to $7,000 a month since she has alzheimer's. My mom has no assets, my dad left her with nothing but his soc. sec. All her sibilings are deceased, it's just me and my brother and we don't have that kind of money. Even the in home caregivers want $24.00 per hour with a miminum of 4 hours each visit. That's almost $2,000 a month which we can't pay. We have applied for the VA Aid and Assistance, but have a 6-9 month processing time. We have started looking for a nursing/residential care home that will accept MediCal. The MediCal people told us we have to find one on our own then they will coordinate with the nursing home to arrange everything.
I now volunteer at three ASL facilities here in town. Although I only have permission to offer magazines and books, I also carry a tray of Hershey bars, Snickers, Kit Kats, etc. The residents love it., especially Architectural Digest and Popular Science/Mechanics. This little effort could be done in NH's and other places where the people can't get out and help themselves to "treats" like these. The little bell rings at night about 7:30 p.m. and they know I'm on the floor. Most of them look forward to my visit.
Wow, thats horrible. I am a total advocate for home care like 100% BUT being so young as you are, wiht a family, you dont want this at your age. How is your Mom, can she afford a caretaker fulltime or go to daycare? Assisted living maybe? Your poor thing. I feel SO bad for you. I see elderly men bringing their frail elderly women to daycare and they refuse to place them in a home, its such true love and devotion it brings tears to my eyes. We children need to help but in cases like yours, bless you, I think your family is more important. Will your Mom understand? What an lesson of love you have shown to your husband and children . Myself, I have Adult children now and they too are very proud of me so please know that your children see what you do even if young and you are an inspiration. But, if you cat get fulltime help with your Moms funds, you are too young with a family and shouldnt put your life on hold. Best of Luck
What if you feel guilty, my mom is 62 and I have 3 children and my mom is disabled and has a venistasis ulser on her leg and needs constant attention. I am only 30 and I change wounds, give IVs at times, dress and bathe and give my mom everything she needs. But my caregiving affects my relationship with my husband, children and myself. I cannot take vacations or even leave for 1 whole not , just a couple of hours........ Is it too much then, should I put my needs and my family's needs above my own..... It is hard to be by age and to tell the truth I don't know how much longer I can do it.... without strenth I dont know how I would have even gone this far... I have been a caregiver for 9 years now and I am only 30!
Bottom line: no facility will be like living in a home environment. By their very nature ALFs and NHs have too many people to take care of and your parent will not get the one-on-one attention he or she would get in your care. Right now, we are doing a combination of caring for Mom ourselves and using some in-home help. So, far it has worked well. However, the time to consider a facility is when the parent's ailments are so severe that it surpasses your ability to care for their medical needs. If it is just a matter of comfort and being a little inconvenienced, I would choose keeping my Mother in a home environment for as long as possible. The golden rule still applies...think about what you would want if you were in their shoes.
I personally believe that if you have the room, the money, the time and the skills needed to host your disabled relative, you should do it for the psychological, emotional and spiritual benefits of using your parent's last months to heal and forgive one another for being imperfect when you were both younger. I've been there with my mother-in-law, and watched the healing for a decade before she died in our family room. It's hard. You will have to grow into the process and learn truckloads. But it's worth it. If you don't have the room/time/skills, etc., then pay someone else to do it. Good luck.
I read the other answers, and these are my thoughts. Having been through a lot, and having a lot of caregiving experience, I think the answer lies with you. If you are the primary caregiver? Are YOU the power of attorney for health care? If so, then the questions and answers lie within you. Ask yourself: Am I able to continue giving my loved on the care he or she needs and deserves? Am I functioning in the best interest of my loved one? If so, and placement is your next move, then ask the facility director or administrator, exactly what kind of care they provide? Will they give oxygen, or breathing treatments if COPD or asthma is a factor? If not - then move on to the next place. There comes a time in all caregivers lives when placement for our loved ones becomes a reality. Can he or she get the best care at home? Or would the best care be elswhere? You should consider your lifestyle and how it is impacted by your caregiving duties. are you still able to assist with all the ADL's? Are you getting adequate sleep? Are you attending regular support group meetings? Are you able to take care of yourself? If your goal is to function in the best interest of your loved one, then you can't possibly make a wrong decision. Pray about it. The answer will come.
If the patient needs consistent monitoring and cannot be left alone, then assisted living facility may be your best option. You have to weigh the cost of home care and the cost of ALF. There are so many factors to consider, such as cost, mental and physical health of the patient, support of family, physician recommendations, etc.
You will need to consider the pros and cons of a home health care agency vs. a ALF: 1) You need to consider whether you want to bring a stranger from a home health care agency into your home. The home health care agency would care for the patient at their home, which is a benefit for some patients. ALF offers three meals a day, monitoring, medication management, etc.
K-Like many other diseases that affect motor skills, they can be different in severity~The National Parkinson Foundation - may be another place to contact. - If Home care skills that are offered in your community do not work-then the next step may be to find a facility for your Mom that can meet her medial needs. You might also speak with a physician or a social worker as to what is available for your Mom. There are resources available, such as this forum, but you have to seek them out... Best, Hap
I think you need to look at the situation and assess whether or not you are willing or able to give the care needed by the person you look after. What would be best for them and you is the guideline really, ask experts and their PCP as well if you are unsure just what the cut off may be for going from OK at home to out of my hands... Good Luck.
Everyone has their own opinion on this but I say when you cant possibly do it at home any longer. The nursing home (skilled or not) will not put up with anger, etc either and will medicate them, so why not medicate them and keep them in a loving environment. Daycare and then homecare is a great break , or home care to give you a break. Its so routine for me now to go from work to pick up my Mom. Sometimes she doesnt know me or is moody, sometimes she is euphoric that I came to get her!! Whatever the case, we sing to music on the way home and she has a family life with my husband and I, wether she remembers or not, she is spoiled and so loved at home. As you can see, I prefer home care and I do it alone using daycare, she was always there for me and now I am there for her. Its up to you, but know that the skilled nursing homes will NOT be as good as you will be.
When the outside caregivers can no longer handle the patient, and when the daily routine ( bathing, dressing, eating and bathroom care) can no longer be privately administered, then it is time to sit down and talk about alternative help. Also, when the in-home routine becomes highly disruptive to other family members, not just the immediate adult children, then it is time.....alternative care must be considered.
Most (not all, but most) AL centers don't give nursing care, so the need for skilled nursing is the clue for a change. If your elder has health problems that need consistent monitoring, or has mediations that are vital and he or she can't be counted on to take the medications on schedule, you may want to consider a nursing home. In other words, if the services offered by the AL aren't enough - it's time for a move. Take care - it's hard to move, but when it's necessary, then you should seriously consider this. Carol
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
What an lesson of love you have shown to your husband and children . Myself, I have Adult children now and they too are very proud of me so please know that your children see what you do even if young and you are an inspiration. But, if you cat get fulltime help with your Moms funds, you are too young with a family and shouldnt put your life on hold. Best of Luck
Right now, we are doing a combination of caring for Mom ourselves and using some in-home help. So, far it has worked well.
However, the time to consider a facility is when the parent's ailments are so severe that it surpasses your ability to care for their medical needs.
If it is just a matter of comfort and being a little inconvenienced, I would choose keeping my Mother in a home environment for as long as possible. The golden rule still applies...think about what you would want if you were in their shoes.
are you still able to assist with all the ADL's? Are you getting adequate sleep? Are you attending regular support group meetings? Are you able to take care of yourself?
If your goal is to function in the best interest of your loved one, then you can't possibly make a wrong decision. Pray about it. The answer will come.
You will need to consider the pros and cons of a home health care agency vs. a ALF: 1) You need to consider whether you want to bring a stranger from a home health care agency into your home. The home health care agency would care for the patient at their home, which is a benefit for some patients. ALF offers three meals a day, monitoring, medication management, etc.
Best,
Hap
Take care - it's hard to move, but when it's necessary, then you should seriously consider this.
Carol