Mom has been battling with RA for over 10years. We put her in assisted living last month when her needs became more than my daughter and I could handle. This morning they called an ambulance for her. She was admitted with a UTI and blood clot in each lung. She’s been in pain for so long that I just want her to be at peace. I feel horrible about this.
I wonder how many elderly parents have died under someone's watch because the caregiver was worried about hurting their parents feelings. I bet it has happened a lot.
You've done the sensible, most unselfish thing even if you don't know it now. Wanting it to be over is a love feeling not something you should ever feel guilt about. Of course you don't want her to suffer anymore. That's love!
Be at peace with yourself.
We all will die one day, to be able to die without pain is something most of us would want for ourselves and our loved ones.