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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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Insomnia and easy to startle awake are signs of traumatic stress. Mothers of small children experience as well as caregivers of the old or infirm. Pay attention to what your body is telling you and try to at least get a weekend off. Paying a sitter now may save you from a total breakdown later.
I've become a very light sleeper, that's for sure. Some nights, I get awakened and can't get back to sleep. Those are loooong nights. The next night, though, I'll take a couple of OTC sleep aids. That zonks me out so I can "catch up".
But, yeah, it's all from stress...compounded by not getting sleep...and having to hit the floor running in the morning...the perfect trifecta for complete burnout.
Take a couple OTC sleep aids. If you don't get your sleep? You're useless.
Thanks for this subject. Yeah, I get to tossing and turning trying to process all those very tough emotions. I wonder things like what was life like for our family dog? I remember that she was as traumatized as we kids were from physical abuse and all the screaming and yelling. I try to review the past and understand myself in the present. This takes hours of course! Then, when I finally start to crash, the neighbor comes home from the bar and the dogs start barking. Very hard to wake up.
I tried melatonin and I felt like I had a hangover the next day. The only thing I like is New Agey music and Rescue Remedy (a Bach flower remedy).
Feehan all I can say after reading your profile is you are an angel. It's no wonder you have trouble sleeping.
Do you have any outside help for your parents? Any down time for yourself, where you can turn off the worry and stress for an hour or two at a time? If not, you MUST find a way to get those things in your life. I swear by physical exercise, which I've added in the last six months of my life. It helps me get rid of all of the stress and keep my mind in the moment because I'm playing a competitive sport (which can be very hard to do). And I've only got one non-disabled parent who doesn't live with me. So I can only imagine the stress you're under. I think if you can get more support and take good care of your mental and physical self, you'll be able to sleep more easily. Hugs to you!
Even though I don't do hand-on care for my aging parents [they still live alone independently] I worry myself sick about them because of their advanced age and still living in a large house with a lot of stairs. Thus, a lot of sleepless nights.
Instead of over the counter pills, I turn on the TV and find reruns of my favorite show "Frasier" and for some reason watching that show at 2 in the morning will put me to sleep... it has a calming effect :) Also in the beginning of the night, one of those Lifetime Movies will have a dulling effect.
I have been to so many doctors, so many supplements just to try to get sleep...17 years now. Boy if I could sleep I could handle caring for my parents so much better. I feel so sick and drained and I hate for that to affect my care giving as well as my parents. Dear Lord give me sleep please and thanks to everyone's kind advice.
Frasier is my sleep helper too. I know it by heart and just have to listen. It fills my mind with funny, rather than real life and I drift of to Seattle. Oh, and Valium.
BoniChak, all I need to do is watch Niles fawn over Daphne, to get me giggling... or picture Niles and Frasier doing instead of air guitars *air violins* :)
Yep sleep deprived for years now. On top of the stress there was menopause for years, finally a bit better at age 60. But then, a night will pop up. like Saturday where I didn't fall asleep until after 5:45 AM and my household gets up at 7:20...very long days! Please be careful with those OTC sleep aids after age 60, they are finding some cause cognitive problems that cannot be erases. Stuff with dyphenhydramaine like Benedryl can be very bad. Look at your diet and exercise plan. For me no coffee or tea after lunch is important and most recently anything with MSG is a no no.
Zzzquil does the trick for me, the liquid variety. I think because it is liquid it gets into the system so much faster. Wish it would work a little longer though. But at least I usually get five to six hours of sleep. And there is so much dysfunction in my family that causes loss of sleep as well. When I can turn off that garbage, think about my grandchildren instead of the unpleasant sibling stuff that helps too. Oh and either Frasier or The Golden Girls.
Insomnia coupled with fatigue, yes. It's an extremely uncomfortable combination - you're desperate to sleep but every time you drift off your eyes pop open. And/or the bed alarm goes off because she's got up to use the commode…
It's very difficult to know whether to do something about it, let alone what, because I do need to be on call during the night 'in case.' Horrible over-imaginings of my mother face down on her bedroom floor with a newly snapped hip while I snooze peacefully on my pillow is probably one of the reasons I'm having trouble, after all. I'm fortunate to get proper respite, the next one coming up in a couple of weeks. Ongoing, everyday solutions - difficult. Do you have any support with your parents' care?
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Pay attention to what your body is telling you and try to at least get a weekend off. Paying a sitter now may save you from a total breakdown later.
But, yeah, it's all from stress...compounded by not getting sleep...and having to hit the floor running in the morning...the perfect trifecta for complete burnout.
Take a couple OTC sleep aids. If you don't get your sleep? You're useless.
I tried melatonin and I felt like I had a hangover the next day. The only thing I like is New Agey music and Rescue Remedy (a Bach flower remedy).
Do you have any outside help for your parents? Any down time for yourself, where you can turn off the worry and stress for an hour or two at a time? If not, you MUST find a way to get those things in your life. I swear by physical exercise, which I've added in the last six months of my life. It helps me get rid of all of the stress and keep my mind in the moment because I'm playing a competitive sport (which can be very hard to do). And I've only got one non-disabled parent who doesn't live with me. So I can only imagine the stress you're under. I think if you can get more support and take good care of your mental and physical self, you'll be able to sleep more easily. Hugs to you!
Instead of over the counter pills, I turn on the TV and find reruns of my favorite show "Frasier" and for some reason watching that show at 2 in the morning will put me to sleep... it has a calming effect :) Also in the beginning of the night, one of those Lifetime Movies will have a dulling effect.
It's very difficult to know whether to do something about it, let alone what, because I do need to be on call during the night 'in case.' Horrible over-imaginings of my mother face down on her bedroom floor with a newly snapped hip while I snooze peacefully on my pillow is probably one of the reasons I'm having trouble, after all. I'm fortunate to get proper respite, the next one coming up in a couple of weeks. Ongoing, everyday solutions - difficult. Do you have any support with your parents' care?