Are you sure you want to exit? Your progress will be lost.
Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
✔
I acknowledge and authorize
✔
I consent to the collection of my consumer health data.*
✔
I consent to the sharing of my consumer health data with qualified home care agencies.*
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
I am not sure what you are asking. Do you need to appoint a POA for your father, but are afraid the conversation will upset him? A POA is something that is done to help the person. No one really wants to be a POA, because it is extra work. An elder needs a POA to help him with either finances or healthcare decisions if he is unable to do it himself. No one wants to think that there will come a time when help is needed, but everyone needs help occasionally. If your father needs help, approach him as it is something you are doing for him, instead of something you are taking from him. Then if he becomes incapacitated for any reason, he won't have to worry about legal and medical matters.
Some conversations are just difficult to have but as adults we have to have them. And also as adults some things are difficult for us to hear but we have to hear them.
I cared for my dad too. In my home for 5 years and then he had to go into a nursing home. When I anticipated his being stubborn about something I used the argument, "Help me help you". I would tell my dad that I wanted the best for him, that I was there for him come hell or high water, but there were going to be times when I needed HIS help.
I just tried to bounce the ball back into his court, giving him control over the situation. This always worked with my dad. If your dad turns out to be more stubborn than my dad just wear him down by discussing it a lot. He has to have a POA. No POA = complete disaster. His not having a POA is not an option.
Here is what worked for me. I used my in-laws to apporach my mom by saying that my MIL asked my husband (her son) to handle POA or health care or whatever is on the agenda. 'Mom, I don't know if you have these type of arrangements, but I can see how important it is.' I can research a good attorney and if you want me to handle such matters IF you need help someday, I'd be happy to help you at that time. But the paperwork has to be done now. Don't you think we should take the first step?
No in-laws? No problem, use someone else he trusts. Actually, we should all have these types of documents so you can use yourself as an exmaple.
Boy this one is hard for me because I can't imagine why someone wouldn't have a POA at his age. I'm 63 and have already written up my POA documents. It's something that everyone should have once they hit mature adulthood.
Tell your dad you just had your own POA documents drawn up and ask about his. Act like it's a normal thing (which it should be). It's like car insurance or home insurance or health insurance. Just because you have car insurance doesn't mean you're going to need to use it immediately. It's insurance for the possibility you might need to use it. He should have POAs for both health and property. Good luck!
Thank you for all suggestions. I guess, it's just a matter of helping him when the time comes. I will approach him this way. He seems to think he is still 50 and not worried about the future. He is stubborn, moody, bossy, and difficult sometimes. It is stressing me out... But all your advise will help me be the stronger adult here and help him when the time comes.
P.S. You can also tell him that "the State/government" will take charge of his care if he doesn't have a named POA. That sends a shiver up the spine of many people...and might cause your dad to want to protect his interests from "the government". :)
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
I cared for my dad too. In my home for 5 years and then he had to go into a nursing home. When I anticipated his being stubborn about something I used the argument, "Help me help you". I would tell my dad that I wanted the best for him, that I was there for him come hell or high water, but there were going to be times when I needed HIS help.
I just tried to bounce the ball back into his court, giving him control over the situation. This always worked with my dad. If your dad turns out to be more stubborn than my dad just wear him down by discussing it a lot. He has to have a POA. No POA = complete disaster. His not having a POA is not an option.
No in-laws? No problem, use someone else he trusts. Actually, we should all have these types of documents so you can use yourself as an exmaple.
Tell your dad you just had your own POA documents drawn up and ask about his. Act like it's a normal thing (which it should be). It's like car insurance or home insurance or health insurance. Just because you have car insurance doesn't mean you're going to need to use it immediately. It's insurance for the possibility you might need to use it. He should have POAs for both health and property. Good luck!