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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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She lives with me but can not be on her own. It is only for five days but I know she is going to be so angry and hurt. I have no other choice, I have no help and finances are very limited. Any ideas how to approach the subject gently?
First of all, I'd wait until the day before you're leaving, so your mom doesn't get all worked up for days and days. I'd put it in terms of you needing to take care of yourself so that you can be there to take care of HER.
It will be like a little holiday for her too. Time away from you, new food and friends and (hopefully?) some activities she can do. Can you call her once or twice to make sure she's doing OK? However she takes it, don't feel guilty. You need time away and your mother will be fine. Have you taken vacations in the past? This is just another one. Mom is getting her own little vacation too. That's what I'd say. Good luck and let us know how it goes.
na na na NA we been together for years, and its wearing me down . im gonna take me a break -- in another tow-wwwn . you can stay at clapboard manor , until we get back. they dont have beds , youll need a fart sa - aack..
Yeah, Blannie's right. If you know she's going to be mad, then let her be mad the day before. And, if I knew she was going to be mad, I wouldn't tell her the truth. If you're going on vacation, I'd make it some kind of must-do business trip you can't get out of.
Does she have dementia at all? Tell her, "Mom, I told you about this a month ago." Then she'll be so busy arguing the you-did-not-I-did-to that you'll be able to pack in between responses. ;)
I hope it's for pleasure! Have a good time. Call her after a couple of days. If she makes your life miserable during that phone call, don't call her again. Wait 'til you get home. Bring her a souvenir. Make it a flashy gee-gaw.
Get hold of a nice cheerful calendar, one of those wall ones with pictures of puppies or roses or whatever she likes. Mark out the days. When you get to the respite care home, put the calendar where she can see it and ask the care assistants (pretty please with sugar on it) if they could very kindly cross the days off for her. She will get upset, regularly, sigh, but this will be a handy visual aid to help them explain to her exactly how long it is before you get back.
I did this with my 84-year-old mom, even taking her to the assisted living facility weeks beforehand to tour, etc. Set her up in a private room with bathroom and kitchenette. Showed her where the cafeteria was and where the card games and reading/puzzle room were, etc. etc. All I heard later was how much she HATED it (she ended up staying in her room the entire time) and that I intended to "dump" her there eventually, and this was "just a trial run"!!! It was the worst experience and COMPLETELY erased all the good feelings/memories from my short weekend sports team-related trip with my husband and teenage son. There were two more weekend tournaments that summer and I ended up missing both, to stay home with mom. And she was completely unappreciative. She didn't even acknowledge that I was missing out on an experience with my own son & husband to stay home with her. I'm with the others -- don't tell her in advance, and be ready for complaints later.
Jeannegibbs, I just wasn't ready at that time to just "..do it anyway" but since then? Oh, yeah!!! Interestingly, that became the straw that broke the camel's back, so to speak.
Oh my I told my dad that has alzheimer's what a mistake...he has put me on the biggest guiltw trip and keeps saying I'm dumping him in a nursing home,I wish I hadn't said anything before. He is 92 and I need some time for myself with my tolerant husband.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
It will be like a little holiday for her too. Time away from you, new food and friends and (hopefully?) some activities she can do. Can you call her once or twice to make sure she's doing OK? However she takes it, don't feel guilty. You need time away and your mother will be fine. Have you taken vacations in the past? This is just another one. Mom is getting her own little vacation too. That's what I'd say. Good luck and let us know how it goes.
na na na NA
we been together for years, and its wearing me down .
im gonna take me a break -- in another tow-wwwn .
you can stay at clapboard manor , until we get back.
they dont have beds , youll need a fart sa - aack..
Does she have dementia at all? Tell her, "Mom, I told you about this a month ago." Then she'll be so busy arguing the you-did-not-I-did-to that you'll be able to pack in between responses. ;)
I hope it's for pleasure! Have a good time. Call her after a couple of days. If she makes your life miserable during that phone call, don't call her again. Wait 'til you get home. Bring her a souvenir. Make it a flashy gee-gaw.
You are coming back, yes..? :)
Have a great break!