Here we go again! After 6 months of my mom not bugging me about my bills(god it's been NICE), she calls me today and starts in again about how "It's been 6 months and I just want to know how things are going" and then tells me "In January We should go over your bills and such. WHY can't she leave me the h*ll alone? I am 41 GD years old. I love the woman but this is becoming absurd. NOTHING I say to this woman gets through to her. If I dare to raise my voice or put my foot down? She tells me to "Go to h*ll" and acts like I am the one who has done something horrible! I can't take it anymore.
You really need to distance yourself from her, it seems to me -- at least for the immediate future. And stop paying her bills. You are "mentally handicapped", remember, and so you certainly can't take responsibility for her. :) She really can't have it both ways, that you are unreliable and that she relies on you for help. Nope. Take care of yourself. Let her take care of herself. You can resolve your problems without her help, and she can deal with her own bills without your help. Fair is fair.
This sounds harsh. Sorry. Growing up often has some harsh spots. You'll survive them -- all of us did!
Call United Way or whatever help referral organization operates in your area, They can help you find services that you can afford.
You need this.
I think Pam's approach is right on target on this one. Just say NO. And stick to it.
"I'd love to get together with you in January, Mom, but not to talk about boring ol' bills. Let's go get our nails done and have a treat."
"Mom, my finances are fine. Thanks for asking. We don't need to discuss them now. ... No, Mom, I'm not going to discuss my finances with you."
Lather, rinse, repeat. You don't want to talk to Mom about your financial situation, don't. Remain calm, polite, and firm. If necessary, "I'm ending this call now Mom. Call me when you want to talk about something besides my finances." Yes, you can actually hang up on your mother and the sky won't fall.
As blannie says, a little more detail would put this question in context, but I can't think of a circumstance where simply refusing to talk about your bills wouldn't be appropriate,
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