I have been caring for my mother who has moderate to extreme Alzhiemers. I have been doing pretty good with the help of my loving husband and wonderful children. However, lately I have been having terrible problems with my uncontroled blood pressure. The Doctor says it is caused by anxiety. I love my mother so much, but I am finding it harder and harder to care for her ever changing and demanding needs. I am wondering if she would not be better off in a memory care center of some sort instead of with me and my family, especially because I am finding it so hard to deal with her that I stay away from her as much as I can. And then I feel so terribly guilty. I read so many wonderul accounts of people who have cared for their parents and I want to do the same for my poor mother, (my father died 6yrs ago) but I am not sure I can take it any more. When is the best time to start looking for alternative care? Will this mess her poor lost mind up even further? Does anyone else have any experience in reaching this point? I only want what is best for her but if I stroke out then I can't imagine that I have done the best by her. My Doctor says that if I do not relieve some of the anxiety that I am under I am looking at some serious health problems for myself and medicine is not doing the trick. Maybe all I need is some encouragement.
1. Would your mother want you to harm yourself, caring for her?
2. If you were to become incapacitated by a stroke tomorrow, your mother would go to a facility. WITH OUT YOU as her advocate.
In a facility, she'll have three shifts of caregivers AND a loving daughter.