Mom is on comfort care (like hospice) which means no life extending treatments, no tests, PT or x-rays, and no iv's, feeding tubes, or CPR etc. We agreed the NH should treat for UTI as that falls under keeping her comfortable. At 101, 82 pounds, with a fractured pelvis, broken arm and dementia Mom will never recover, walk again or care for herself, needs 24/7 care and will live in the moment and constantly try to get up.
One of the questions on the list was if she develops upper respiratory distress, should they x-ray and treat or just administer oxygen. I told them I couldn't make that decision without my sister, and she too, does not know what to tell them, whether it is right to prolong things with antibiotics or keep her comfortable and let her pass naturally.
So, I am asking my forum friends, what would you do? What is the right thing to do?
I have heard a palliative nurse say that they can control their deaths up to a point, if she wants you there she will hold on until you are present, if she goes at night it will be because she preferred it that way.
No one has made any predictions about how long mother has and I don't suppose they can. The doctor said in cases like mother's often their heart stops in their sleep and they don't even know why. I am sad too - end of life is always sad I think. I have no idea if I will be able to get there when the time comes or if I will get a phone call that she has gone. I will go down in a week or so and see it as a farewell visit though she may go on for a while. This is such a difficult time. ((((((((Hugs)))))))