All the thoughtful answers in this forum have helped. They also raise a question: Where are these doctors who decide when or whether a loved one can return home to live independently? Right now I would LOVE to have anyone say something definitive. After a severe brain injury several years ago, my brother (now 65) lived successfully in his own condo. Last week he fell repeatedly and developed sudden-onset confusion (hallucinating & unsure where he is). MRI shows decreased “white matter” but no new injuries. A hospital nurse told me (unofficially since I don’t have POA) that he needs 24 hr care “from now on.” I live an hour away and work during the day. Today the hospital transferred him to a SNF for transitional rehab. He alternates between thinking he IS home vs. being angry that he’s somewhere else. Today he said “some lady” visited & said he can’t live alone anymore. Who, if anyone, is making decisions? Insights appreciated.
The social services department at the nursing home will know.
Sorry for lengthy reply. I’m usually good at decision making, but right now I’m heartsick and see no acceptable option. Again, thank you for your common sense in the face of my bewilderment.
As an 'unsafe discharge' he was transferred to rehab. If 'unsafe discharge' from rehab he will stay in nursing home environment unless he is able to leave himself. It's not holding people like prisioners as such, but even when very stubborn, if an older frail person literally can't walk out the door or call a taxi, they are effectively stuck there.
Your brother is younger & may improve his walking & indeed walk out the door. I have heard of this happening in my area recently. The man had recent surgery (brain tumor) but not deemed incapable at that stage legally so he had the right to discharge himself. The neighbour actually alerted the hospital that the man was back in his house. I think Police were informed & asked to do welfare checks. His Sister (in another state) was then as you are, thrown into this & was advised to get Guardianship. The poor man would not have been able to obtain cash for food or any self care/pay bills etc. Don't know the ending but I believe the Police/Ambulance services were going to transport him back to a hospital - maybe under mental health act if required. His Sister was quickly findng a permanent nursing home & planned to move his things in & hoped evetually he adjusted to his new home. I think she was being helped by a Social Worker as to what she could do within thelaw / as next of kin / health ethics.
Only natural to sit down & have a huge cry - like mourning the brother you had before this. (((Hugs)))
Then continue to reach out for advice (that Social Worker sounded ok) to look at the facts & what needs to be done.
The ones that are provided by the hospital or doctors expire every 12 months.
He may be able to understand and sign for you to become his POA, but this is a fudiciary responsibility and you should understand exactly what you would be taking on before you do that. He would need to have his signature notarized and they may ask if he understands what he is signing.
Check with the homeowners insurance company to ensure that his insurance will cover if the home is empty because of long hospitalization/SNF stay. Most do not and you only find out if something happens. He probably has HOA fees as well that you want to find out if he can pay those, SNF is expensive and he may need Medicaid that will say he can't pay anything towards his home, no property tax, insurance, utilities or anything.
It is a tremendous amount to understand and deal with. He is blessed to have you.