My MIL feeds the dog from her bed and has turned the "perfect dog" into a horrible begging, barking mess. No matter what I say, MIL sneaks food to the dog.......resulting in constant begging , barking, etc non stop. Another casualty of this caretaking.
if mom complains just tell her the truth - you have asked her not to feed the dog for the health of the dog and you refuse to comply with your request so you have to keep the dog out if she has food. tell her when she is done and the food is cleared away (look for hidden food) the dog can come keep her company.
this stopped the bidding food feeding. then I keep a close eye on her and when she goes to give food to dog I just tell her don't feed the dog. if she tells me she isn't I ask her to show me her hand. it sounds harsh but we have to make the hard decisions that we know are right not only for our aging parents but for our own family too.
ITS OK TO PUT YOU AND YOUR FAMILY's NEEDS AND WANTS BEFORE YOUR AGING PARENT!