Mom appears to be going down now, and dimentia has set in extreme weakness etc. She is 92, all alone, and 1K miles away. Needs 24/7 care. Currently have caregiver who is great @ 12/h , = $280 /day Cannot afford much more of that... I had heard some live in might charge $150/day , and I may have to look for that. What criteria does hospice need to come in? No real terminal illness, just worn down and give up ready to go... We live very far away, and she desires to be at home when her time comes. Any suggestions? Thanks
They will come in a few times a week, more if needed to shower, dress and take care of some needs but that is the CNA and she/he would be there probably an hour at most.
A nurse would come in 1 time a week, a Social Worker, 1 time a month.
You need someone that will be with your Mom 27/7
Hospice will come in and assess if she is a candidate for Hospice or maybe Palliative Care.
Hospice will go wherever your Mom is so at home or in an Assisted Living or Memory Care facility.
What you are paying is about standard.
You will probably need someone at night as well. That may cost more.
When you look at the cost of staying at home VS a facility take into account you will no longer pay property tax, homeowners insurance, gas, electric, garbage pick up, water or sewer bills (if you are on city water and sewer) and your food bills will go down drastically since meals are provided. And you will not be paying the caregiver unless you wish to pay someone to come in and visit or take her out in addition to outings provided by the facility.
You can check cost where she currently is and compare costs closer to you then make the decision to keep her where she is or mover her closer to you.
I know she wants to remain at home but that may not be possible if she is at risk, if the house is not adaptable to her changing needs as she declines.
Are bathrooms large enough to maneuver a wheel chair, could you get a Hoyer Lift or a Sit to Stand into the bathroom.Are there stairs going into the house? To the bedroom? Is there carpet that might have to be torn out to make it easy to move a walker or a wheelchair or to prevent trips? Are doors and halls wide enough to get a wheel chair from one room to another? Do you have grab bars where they are needed? Are toilets elevated?
All these things will cost money to change.
Unfortunately a move often comes after a catastrophic event that requires surgery and rehab.
Palliative care is a fairly new program, from what I've been told by providers, and is a step up from hospice care.
Now to the other point of your query, my mother only asked to "go home" for a short time before I realized it meant she needed to go to the bathroom. Everyone is different!
Have you looked into Medicaid [which is different from Medicare] to help you place your wife into a continuing care facility once it becomes too difficult for you to care for her at home. Medicaid will pay for all of her care. You would need to hire an Elder Law Attorney to help you through this maze, with you being the spouse still living at home, especially if you own a house, so that you can keep your fair share of house and savings.
Oh why does getting older have to be so darn complicated :(
I know you are trying to keep your mom at home as per her wish. Have you tried talking to a social worker? Maybe she can help access more resources in the community.
Or are they the same level of program, with different names? Palliative Care has been recommended for my father, with the suggestion of a doctor monthly and nurses biweekly. What I haven't yet determined (haven't done that much research) is how much therapy can be provided. I've found a good palliative care company which I'll probably use; it's the best I've found through interviews so far.
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